Tips to help you get through hard times

Life is hard, disappointing and often uncooperative with our plans. Things do not turn out as planned or even do not happen at all, they fall apart. Even when we earnestly pray, the answers may not be as we had expected.

After experiencing loss, crisis or failure, many people tend to retreat into a shell or isolation because, to them, their life is simply over. They stop living and just exist by going through the daily motions of life.

Similarly, there are people who no matter what life throws at them, they always get back on their feet and move on. They have amazing resilience. It is as though they wait for a crisis to get better. To keep going on is an act of courage. American novelist Ernest Hemingway says, “Courage is grace under pressure.”

The story of Job in the Bible teaches us how to have the courage to keep on going no matter the prevailing circumstances. Job was the wealthiest and most prominent man in the land. Then one day, his life was turned upside down. He lost all his wealth, the livestock was destroyed and his children were murdered. In addition, he contracted a terminal disease but he still pulled through.

First, have the courage to worship. This way you unload all your feelings of disappointment to God. Job stood up, tore his robes in grief, shaved his head then fell to the ground and worshipped. He physically, visibly and humbly expressed his pain.

When one experiences a tough time, they go through four emotions: Anger - why is this happening to me? Grief - what have I lost? Shock - what do I do now? Fear - what is going to happen next? It is in worship that you can freely express them. Do not suppress them.

We serve a God bigger than our emotions and problems - when you are laid off or receive that call of a terminal disease; you can take it to the Lord in prayer. Job was bluntly honest with God, “Therefore, I will not restrain my mouth; I will speak in the anguish of my spirit; I will complain in the bitterness of my soul” (Job 10:1).

“Arise and cry out in the night, at the beginning of the watches; pour out your heart like water before the face of the Lord. Lift your hands towards him for the life of your young children, who faint from hunger at the head of every street. Bless the Lord at all times and praise him continually!” (Lamentations 2:9)

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Second, dare to accept help. Remember that no one is a Superman! God intended and wired us for each other - to comfort and edify. Thus, we all need each other to handle pain, stress, loss, crisis, etc. As the saying goes, a problem shared is a problem half solved.

Job advices, to him who is afflicted, kindness should be shown by his friend, even though he forsakes the fear of the Almighty. Apostle Paul admonishes us to walk worthy of our calling with all lowliness and gentleness, with long-suffering, bearing with one another in love, endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

Third, have the courage not to ask God questions. When you are going through tough times do not ask why - it only prolongs your pain. Job asked so many questions until he learnt that in misery, explanations do not offer someone any comfort.

Fourth, dare to trust God with things you do not understand. God starts asking Job questions, “Who is this who darkens counsel by words without knowledge? Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Who determined its measurements? To what were its foundations fastened? (Job 38:1-5)

Job then realised that as a human being, his knowledge is limited and cannot be compared to that of an all-knowing (omniscient) God. Job responded, “I know that you can do everything and no purpose can be withheld from you. Therefore, I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know” (Job 42:2-3).

Fifth, have the courage not to become bitter. Job proclaimed that naked he came from his mother’s womb and naked shall he return there.

The Lord gave and he has taken away, blessed be his name. Pain, sorrow and grief will not destroy or kill you; but bitterness will. Ensure that no bitterness takes root in you because it will cause deep trouble and hurt your spiritual life. Do not be bitter, be better!

Sixth, have the courage to face the future. “Then all your troubles will fade away from your memory like past floods that are remembered no more. Your life will be brighter than the sunshine at noon, and life’s darkest hours will shine like the dawn. You will live securely and full of hope. Yes, you will dig around you and take your rest in safety” (Job 11:16-18).

Reach out to God by putting your heart right with him. Put away evil and wrong and face the world again firmly and courageously. Keep on going. Darkness will give way to light and you will come out of it in Jesus name!