Bluntness and sincerity are the cornerstones of most relationships. Talking candidly and honestly about sex, passion, commitment, and one’s aspirations for the future helps it grow into a long lasting union.
However, there are some questions that a man never wants to hear come out of his woman’s mouth. These are questions that are irrelevant in the relationship yet women insist on asking them.
Tell me about your ex
As might be expected, the topic of the ex is bound to come up at some point in the relationship. It is okay to ask why they broke up and whether they are still friends. This conversation becomes dangerous when you start obsessing over it and ask questions like ‘is she hotter than me?’ or ‘between me and her, who is the better kisser?’. When you constantly bring up his ex, you come across as hopelessly insecure.
How many lovers have you had?
Nothing positive can come out of this one. Whatever he did in his past is between him and his conscience. Questions about numbers only beget more questions and create more insecurity. It is none of your business how many women he has slept with. The only thing you need to know about his sexual past is whether he’s disease free. ‘How many women have you had sex with is blond. What should bother you is, “Do you have an STD?”
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It sounds sexy and seductive when you ask, but you only reek more of your insecurities. Chances are, you are not the best he has ever had and hearing him say that will demoralise you. Most men won’t come right out and say it, so you end up putting him in a difficult situation where he has to lie because he wants you to feel confident and beautiful on a daily basis.
Do you love me?
If a man truly loves you, he will let you know. Asking him this question puts him on the spot and he will most likely lie to avoid hurting your feelings or tell you the truth and hurt your feelings. Either way, the outcome is undesirable. Those three little words should not be forced out of someone. Men do not always wear their emotions on their sleeves but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you.
Do you see a future with me?
This question is perfectly appropriate and even important to ask after you have been dating for a while. The timing makes all the difference. Needless to say, there is a problem with asking this question early on in the relationship. There is a big chance that you will just scare him off if you begin addressing the “serious” issues before you are far enough into the relationship.