Why do people in relationships cheat?

A lot of people in long-term relationships are tempted to cheat, and it seems many of them give in to the urge.

A whopping 28,000 people were divorced on the grounds of adultery, according to the most recent figures from the Office for National Statistics.

And relationship experts Relate say infidelity was the number one reason for couples asking for their help last year.

But what makes people do it, and are men and women really all that different when it comes to cheating?

Mamta Bhatia, a psychologist and the founder of Think Spa London, says there are a broad range of reasons why people cheat.

“Cheaters might have insecurities within themselves and being able to have more than one partner can be a way to boost their self-esteem,” she says.

Mamta also believes people’s attitudes to relationships and affairs can be profoundly influenced by their parents.

“If someone grew up seeing their parents cheat, it could normalise that kind of behaviour for them.”

But men and women have affairs for different reasons psychologically.

“When a woman has an affair it is usually a way of dealing with the emotional and physical needs that are missing from her relationship,” Mamta explains.

“She is clear in her mind about the type of person she needs, so if her partner doesn’t fit that image then she will have an affair in order to find something better.

“She may be swept off her feet or acting out of boredom but she will always be thinking about the long-term effects.

“For a man it tends to be a more impulsive reaction and he has less control over his sexual drive.

“He’ll focus more on the moment, rather than considering what the consequences of cheating are.

“It may be because he suffers from low self-esteem due to a physical gap in his relationship, and in this case sex gives him the ego boost that he needs.

“Sex is a short-term solution and a barometer of his self-worth, whereas a woman may see an adulterous relationship as a solution to her problems in the long-term.”

Mamta believes communication is the best thing couples can do to try to prevent either cheating.

“If couples have that level of honesty with one another, they may be able to say they have feelings for someone else before an affair happens.”