Why women thrive on compliments

For a while now, I have seen women get riled by men delving in to poke holes in to our perceived good nature. That other gender has been intentionally breaching our comfort by bringing out our well-kept secrets and exposing us for who we truly are, something that is increasingly making us uncomfortable.

Those of us who have the guts have replied them with unprintable words and directed huge watts of emotions their way to try and stop them in their tracks before they completely blow out our cover.

They have now moved the conversation from 'do women cheat' to 'why women cheat' forcing us to start a justification of something that we are more comfortable denying. The matter of DNA verification has taken the center stage lately with men gradually pushing for their right to know the paternity of the child before their names are engraved on the birth certificates of the children.

Probably, what is pushing the men to demand for the verification is the price tag acknowledging paternity comes with. The fact that once legally recognised as a father a man is obligated to take full responsibility is provoking their reaction - logically so. Our fear is that this is how the push for reforms start in small spurts of discomfort and in no time can become mainstream agenda that might just end up being a piece of legislation.

Well, in a guarded admission woman have started to string together some explanation to form a defense in the event that this tide of ill intended expose does not stop. Men have always fronted this tired justification that they host two full sacks of living seeds swimming in their gonads nonstop to try to find an exit. In response we have prepared a document to justify our case.

While men consider themselves physical animals who are entitled to chase after every piece of pleasant gluteal muscle, we pitch our case from an emotional angle because God created us with more feelings in our hearts than reason in our heads once we have a vacuum.

You see, if we are starved of validation from a man, and I say this is a biggest concern for us women. Even a good sheep like a church deaconess can turn wild and use the shepherd for work outside their religious scope.

If we are starved of attention from our man then we spontaneously start shopping around for it, we start listening more keenly to every positive word the pastor or boss throws our way. Yes, we are a piece of work and because men are increasing digging in to find what is at the core of a woman, we are starting to admit that we need endless watering from them in order to stay fully faithful and not entertain compliments from elsewhere.

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When a woman looks beautiful and her man doesn't complement her, he doesn't make time for her, he no longer gives her attention, the woman gets so starved in that moment that unfortunately, what it takes is one man to give an ounce of attention. We will zoom in on that attention, forget all the other red flags in the new man and focus on the validation he brings us.

Our hearts instantly get attracted to him because it's the feel-good sense that we are chasing, not the person. He might be uglier than our partner, shorter and could be much limited in achievement compared to our man but when he makes us feel good the female in us appreciates them and awards them the prize.

We are preparing to justify to the plenary why we fall for our drivers, farmhands, colleagues and friends of our husbands who take their time to appreciate our dressing and other things that matter to us like new hairstyles and loss of weight.

In truth, if we start to feel appreciated by a man there is also a simultaneous fear that grips our being. We become afraid that it might end if we do not compensate for it accordingly and of course it is a known fact that women to not pay for services in cash especially those that touch their starved hearts.

We prefer to pay in kind by serving the newcomer the very meal that the main man takes for granted. It gives us a sense of win over the man to know that we are still in a good enough form to attract interest and serve another man's need.

Men, if you want to keep a loyal wife or girlfriend, always remind us that we are loved because if you forget to give us that, we will become desperate for it.