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Keeping the flame burning in a long-distance relationship

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 Keeping the flame burning in a long-distance relationship (Photo: iStock)

In this beautiful world of equal opportunity that we have created, relationships often suffer from the strain of distance. As we seek individual career paths, we end up drifting away from our relationship partners.

The big elephant in the room is whether distance is a sufficient reason to give up a relationship. As physical distance creeps up on lovers due to different schedules and professional commitments, learning how to keep the fire of intimacy alive despite the challenge of distance is an important skill to master.

Distance can alienate lovers, but it is never enough to extinguish the affection created by shared memories. The surest way to keep the flame of intimacy burning is through constant and consistent communication. Communication helps love grow deeper, it shows thoughtfulness.

Constant communication provides the reassurance that despite the distance, your priorities are still in order and your partner is at the top of the list. Relationships exist as an escape from loneliness, and communication plays a key role in keeping the sense of isolation that physical distance can bring at bay.

Communication comes in different forms based on what your partner responds to best; it could be something as elementary as a simple warm text or as generous as a goofy little video. There is no writing on the wall on how to best talk to your better half, some people are more comfortable with the intimate nature of lengthy phone calls while others fancy endless hours of texting.

The chosen method should be built to fit the style your partner fancies the most. Another key pointer with communication is the timing, studying your partner's schedule and routine helps you pick out the most appropriate timing for that call or text without necessarily interrupting a busy work schedule or a critical work-related seminar.

Communication should be considerate and convey intimacy through the use of a warm and cordial tone for improved efficiency.

A long-distance relationship is built on trust as the bedrock. It is no good to lose sleep worrying over the infinite possibilities of all that could go wrong. The worries and the urge to control everything can torpedo the trust needed to maintain a long-distance union. Seeing the best of all probable outcomes helps in building the trust and faith that you have in your partner.

A healthy relationship is centred on the safety that comes with knowing that your partner has your best interest. Aristotle's Golden Mean best defines the stance that lovers have to take towards each other. The Golden Mean lays emphasis on treating your partner how you would like to be treated.

This doctrine rids the relationship of the hypocrisies that break most relationships. Faith in your better half is the fibre that binds long-distance unions. The silent expectations of conduct of lovers are guided by the best interest of the other party, sacrifices have to be made towards this end. If a relationship does not have sufficient trust from the onset, distance is doomed to obliterate what little intimacy remains in the union.

Physical contact is a fundamental part of building intimacy in a relationship. Although the challenge of distance exists, partners have to find the time or make time from their busy schedules for regular physical meet-ups. The commitment to sacrifice time and effort in making that trip washes away the worry of neglect.

The assurance that you will see your partner on a specific agreed date rekindles the bond. These regular meet-ups are important in rekindling intimacy as they provide an ideal platform to talk about more intimate issues that are better discussed in person.

Relationships that exist as purely long-distance unions feel futile after lengthy periods of time. Being in a long-distance relationship that has little physical contact breeds discontent and the feeling of being trapped, if left unchecked, the feeling of discontentment eventually breaks the union.

In every long-distance relationship, there must be an exit plan to get you into the arms of your lover. The physical contact might be minimal but it is absolutely necessary to keep the flame of intimacy burning.

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