A story about Valentine's

Earlier this week, I got a text from an old friend called Faith saying she was visiting from Coast. She asked if we could meet and catch up over a few drinks in a nice place on Sunday evening before she flew back Monday morning.

Then I got a call from a media lady we'll call Stacy whom I have not seen in 2014 or 2015, could we do that long postponed coffee on Friday afternoon? Then on Facebook up popped a Tamara whom I haven't laid eyes on since 2010/11, but here she was on chat talking about a house warming party in Ruaraka on Saturday night.

Strange, I thought - but then my friend Andrew said a single intern called Nancy has suddenly become amenable to a date, so long as it is on Sunday and she is taken out of town all day and dropped at her folks' place by sunset; and Lora is ready to talk to Nelson over dinner on Sunday.

Nelson dogged on her on Boxing Day, she dumped him on New Year's Eve after finding damning texts, and had refused to pick his calls, unfollowed and unfriended him, the works ... until this week, when she is ready to talk to him in an expensive and elegant place like Panari, as long as he comes with a make up gift and bouquet of flowers.

'Better carry a wreath to bury your already dead relationship,' Andrew advised Nelson drolly. 'The wench is only out to wrench a one day 'make up' Valentine date out of you, then dump your cheating ass forever.'

And, indeed, why not?

Tomorrow, February 14, Valentine's Day is a big deal to everybody, but especially the ladies, the world over.

A lucky Kenyan couple who participated in the Eve Magazine picture competition this month will later today enjoy a Swedish massage for two at the Hilton, enjoy some bubbly with their love dinner before being ushered to a deluxe suit at the prestigious Hilton Hotel in town.

KTN has a Sarova prize for the person with the most romantic, clever, funny or complete disaster love story ever. So, here goes.

Clever - About eight years ago I had the clever idea to hide an engagement ring in a glass of champagne and propose to this woman.

Romantic - the flute of champagne was to be offered as a passenger complimentary by the KQ crew at sunset as we flew to Dar-es-Salaam.

Funny - she drained the champagne so fast she almost swallowed the ring that had cost a pretty penny. Complete disaster - six and a half years down the line, we were done with said lady, and I donated my own expensive ring to a street beggar lady.

Seriously, though, why should it be only Beryl up there who gets away with telling tales of her runaway men, and get more laughs than Mr Funny, Me?

Okay, Sarova Stanley, that's my story, and I am coming tomorrow for my horse carriage ride, strawberry and cream champagne welcome, butler served lunch in breath-taking setting, a tour of the hotel (you've gotta show me where Hemingway, my author drinker hero stayed), high balls at the Exchange Bar, candle-lit dinner at the pool deck so we can see the flicker of flame and pool lights on le dear beloved Flora's face, and it is nice that the prize suit is named after another legendary writer, Karen Blixen.

If you don't have a Valentine, no worries, I hear for Sh1,400, there is a mobile phone company offering flirtextations to your phone all day, a textlationship telling you how loved and treasured you are, complete with XoXos from an App called 'Brother Ocholla.' :-)

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