Have you ever dealt with friends who you know aren’t good for you? Most of us have gotten to that point where we have to analyze the people we call ‘friends’ and this is actually one of the strongest forms of self-care.
Ignoring the fact that you have some toxic companions in your circle could lead to serious consequences. Although it’s sometimes uncomfortable to address these types of situations, it’s extremely important that you figure out how to deal with them.
It’s high time you accept you need to handle this issue ASAP. Here’s how.
Before we dive in, the first step is to define what bad friendships look like. This is an important step because you want to make sure that you don’t end up overreacting or cutting ties with those who truly care for you.
You need to assess how you’re feeling and how your friends have been treating you and really look at things from different perspectives.
Once you have had a serious heart to heart conversation with yourself, you will now know how to handle each unique situation.
Have a private conversation with your friendThis is a mature way of communicating your concerns with someone. This will help them feel less defensive and less intimidated and on top of that you have a chance to tell them how you feel without any distractions.
You might find out that they genuinely didn’t realize how they’ve been treating you and maybe you can trace the root of the problem before deciding to move forward.
Don’t beat around the bushWhen talking to these types of friends, be as direct as possible. This is your opportunity to unload that emotional burden you’ve been feeling so this is not the time to sugar coat things. The problem with sugar coating is you will still feel resentful if you do decide to stay in the friendship. It’s better to be as honest as possible once and for all.
Tell it like it is but in a polite and respectful manner. In all actuality, tone matters a whole lot. It may make or break whatever little you’re trying to salvage.
Get some back upThis approach is different and it’s more suitable when you’re not comfortable having a one on one conversation with a toxic friend. Maybe they have a bad temper or you just need a third party to help you get the message across in an effective way.
This is a great technique because it will help them see that they need to work on themselves more. They will realize that if different people are telling them they need to make some adjustments then it’s probably true.
Slowly cut them offIt’s definitely painful to realize that someone you love is no longer being a good friend to you. But sometimes, the best thing you can do if you still want to keep them around is to start spending time with other friends who appreciate you.
The bad friend may not be horrible to you but if you genuinely feel like you’re just going in two different directions, it might be time to move on.
Let the friendship fade away naturally and focus on building new, wonderful friendships.
Abstain from all forms of contactThis is something that many people are afraid of. It’s very uncomfortable and that’s why some find themselves struggling to hold onto things that aren’t working out anymore.
Some friends are actually straight up narcissistic, manipulative, abusive and sometimes violent and those aren’t things you should hold on to at all.
See, whenever you’re in a situation that could potentially put you in danger, you need to immediately remove yourself from there. This isn’t the time to feel bad for them because your feelings matter too.
You need to put yourself first by avoiding any form of contact with them once you decide to break up with them.
If you could pick any place in the world, where would you live?