I have a problem. I think I need urgent help. I am 24 and I have always found myself dating women who are older than me. In my life, I have never dated a younger girl. I find older women more attractive and interesting to be with and many times they also seem happy and contented with the relationship. I think I am getting addicted to older women and think it is time I started thinking about a long term relationship. I want to date ladies that are younger than me but I find it hard to leave the older ones. Please advise me. {Ken}
Your Take:
You sound funny. Who told you that dating older women is a sin? The question you should ask yourself is, do you love them? If yes, keep it up but be faithful to only one. If not, you are simply promiscuous and you should stop. Always remember that a good relationship is the one in which mutual happiness is the major bond.
{Peter Oyaro}
The issue of dating older women is just not entirely bad if you find them more appropriate. In any case, younger ladies are so temperamental and insecure when it comes to love.
{Aseri Dick}
These women are not serious with you and may only be using you. Most of them are usually desperate for a man and only exploit younger men sexually.
You are too young to ruin your bright future for women who are your mother’s age or divorcees or those who may have other complications such as HIV. Take your time and seek advice on life before jumping on things you will regret in future.
{Onyango Outha}
Older women can be addictive and possessive because they may be less nagging and more loving than younger ones. To a young man, they are the most dangerous group.
Disengage yourself immediately; and this may require the services of a counsellor and once you are off their hook, get your young girl, learn to love her and don’t look back. Remember, older women are more into sex so the dangers of them having multiple lovers are always prevalent.
{Tasma Saka}
Ken, it is good you have come back to your senses because you were truly lost. It is not too late and you have a chance to change and forget about these women.
They will treat you nicely but at the end of the day, you will still need to have your own family. Look for a young girl you will surely learn how to love and plan to settle down with.
{Fred Jausenge}
You are the only one who knows which category in life you want to belong to. However, be informed that dating older women is only short-lived and will always keep you in a comfort zone which will keep you away from reality. Find a suitable girlfriend you can blend with and share aspects of life.
{Andrew Didy Chaplin}
Counselor’s Take:
This issue is not entirely unique. It has been around for ages and is not about to go away. Older women are always an irresistible allure for younger men for many reasons. Your situation would not be an exception except for the fact that you have never dated a lady who is younger than you.
In a relationship like yours (going against the norm) you are generally much younger than the women you date. So we could explore why such relationships exist and why they are extremely intriguing for men.
For starters, younger women are usually more demanding of time and other resources. Often, they will also be fairly judgmental of the man’s status and achievements. This is pretty much in order because women are configured to size up men that are interested to know if they are capable of taking care of them and in future their children.
However, older women will be more accommodating and less judgmental of suitable mates because they may not be looking for the things that a young lady is looking for and they do not want to have your baby which is quite reassuring for a young man. They will also be relatively stable and successful so they have their day-to-day needs taken care of unlike a young girl who will be concerned about this.
Another common reason men prefer older women is they are not looking for commitment. This is rather intriguing for young men as it relieves them of the worry that she will want to drag him to her parents seven days after getting intimate with him and shortly immediately thereafter down the aisle.
Not to mention that in some of these relationships will have a pack of goodies to go with it that include money, gifts and occasionally they will let you drive their flashy car.
This is not a sustainable practice as you will soon need to settle down and build yourself up. I can assure you that as a man, it is practically impossible to build yourself up on the back of a woman. A man has to find his way around this life to support and build a woman, not the other way round.
Most men who date older women only become irresponsible and worthless men in their older years since they did not learn how to fend for themselves early on.
At 24, you have a long way to go in finding your space in this life. You cannot do this if you continually date women who will always babysit you and caution you from the hardships and shocks of this life. It is just a perception that you have and it is time you tried doing the right thing which is dating a lady that is right for you. {Taurus}