Ladies, have you ever gone out with a guy you were completely not interested in for the sole purpose of getting a free meal? I am ashamed to admit that I have and I know most of you have too!
For me, it was when I was a struggling student in the university. Campus life was hard! I didn’t have parents with deep pockets to lend a helping hand, so I had to survive entirely on the Higher Education Loans Board largesse and as you can imagine, money was always pretty tight.
I literally lived on the breadline. I had to scrimp and save just to be able to afford basic commodities, so splurging Sh2,000 on a steak was totally out of the question.
It wasn’t even about having a desire for haute cuisines; just a meal, any decent meal as long as it wasn’t coming out of my own pocket.
These are obviously not my proudest moments, but what’s a girl to do when she has had instant noodles for a week straight and is aching for a decent meal?
That is when I discovered that there are quite a number of gentlemen with a lot of money to burn and don’t mind spending money lavishly on a beautiful woman.
I believe I have always been easy on the eye so getting them to ask me out wasn’t difficult. Soon I was eating out in five star restaurants at least twice a week.
The difficult part came when they started expecting something in return like sex or a commitment and I had to start dodging their calls and texts.
Sometimes they would get the picture and leave quietly and I would move on to the next schmuck I could leech off of. Sometimes it ended badly in tears and name-calling.
Now that I am older and wiser (and financially independent, but that is besides the point), I don’t think it is a good idea even though I wouldn’t discourage it either.
I had to endure a lot of boring conversations or just put up with men with horrible attitudes. All that crap just for a free meal?
Honestly, it sounds ridiculous. However, if you are up for the boredom and the awkwardness, by all means, go for it, especially if you are young and carefree.
I, however, find it in bad taste when grown women do this. By your thirties you should have your ‘ish’ together and not have to rely on a man to indulge on a gourmet meal.
I talked to a guy friend about this issue and he had a few choice words for women who do this. He reckons it is devious and shady and there is a special place in hell for women who trick men like this.
He said that a woman shouldn’t waste a man’s hard earned money by allowing him to buy her food knowing very well that she doesn’t want to pursue a relationship with him. I, however, beg to differ.
Men take out women on dates for the sole purpose of getting into their pants all the time so how is this any different? We are just leveling the playing field.
However, if it is any consolation, I don’t think bad dates are ever a waste of time or money.
At the end of the day, you learn something about yourself or your date that helps you in future dates. So chin up and continue paying for our meals.