Relationship lessons to learn from Ruth Kamande's death sentence

Justice Jessie Lesiit of the High Court on Thursday afternoon handed Ruth Kamande the death sentence for killing her boyfriend Farid Mohammed in September 2015. The judge concluded that Ruth drew pleasure from stabbing her boyfriend 22 times and was not remorseful even while in court.

In her defence, Ruth had earlier told the court that Farid had threatened to kill her after she discovered he was HIV positive.

“Farid told me that he would rather kill me and himself than have his status exposed. l stabbed him severally using a kitchen knife. The knife which he was holding fell on my chest after I overpowered him by putting my two thumbs in his eyes to save my life,” she said

In the sentencing, the judge said the decision should serve as lesson to young lovers.

Here are tips you should apply in case you get into a fight with your lover to avoid being in Ruth’s situation:

1. Walk away if you are angry during a confrontation. Wait until you are calmer to have a conversation. That way, you are able to address it in a more objective manner.

2. Think before you act: Do not do anything blindly in the heat of the moment. Anger and frustration tends to make us lose our sense of reason and things could turn ugly.

3. Take time out: If you find yourself really angry, relax, take a deep breath and even walk out of the room to catch some air. Taking some time out helps clear the mind and helps us reason clearly. You can also get in some exercises or watch a funny movie.

4. Count to 10: This acts as a distraction to your find from whatever is angering you. It also helps clear the mind hence enabling you to think straight.

5. Know when to seek help: according to Mayo Clinic, it is advisable that you reach out and seek for help if you realise you have trouble managing your anger.