Why successful women are so unlucky in love

Sarah Jepkemboi Chumo Serem (EBS), the Chairperson of the Salaries and Remuneration once confessed in an interview that once in a leadership role, many women report feeling on their own, lonely, and lacking support.

One of the keys to the 'loneliness' issue, is that, in general, women have a different way of finding security than men. Women crave affirmation to feel secure, but most do not find this at the top.

Most of these women are in their 35 and above divorced or yet to get married but can't tie any man down. We sampled some of the reasons below.

Men want a wife not a medal

If you're a successful woman, there's something you need to know. Your career accomplishments aren't all that a man is looking for. A man does not fall in love with a degree from Harvard University, a six-figure income, and an impressive job title. He falls in love with a woman. A man feels emotional attraction for a woman when he sees something special about a woman's personality, and he suddenly recognizes her as unique. Some men like Pius Githinji are afraid of successful women because they lack personality.

"Ï dated one accomplished woman but we could not have conversations aside from mathematics. Even my friends started avoiding me. Can you believe she introduced herself as a graduate from a certain university each time we met new people. It only lasted for three months," Pius told us.

Men misread them

Having a busy successful career definitely changes the way a woman acts while in love and relationships. Balancing work and relationships can be a real ongoing challenge.

There may be moments where a woman can't offer love and affection thanks to work induced stress. If a man can't see the kinder, gentler side of you, he may misread the woman you truly are who's all about love and intimacy, too.

"I'm looking for a man on my level but all of them are afraid to date me because they think that I will also bring work and stress to our home just as they do," Nancy Mwende a senior marketing manager at an international media house

Men their age are sponsors

Middle aged, especially after a failed marriage, no longer want to be tied down and consider marriage of obligation. He seeks a younger woman to convince himself somehow that dating a younger woman will bring back his youthfulness and give him a second chance to have fun again.

"Some men date younger women to prove to themselves they haven't lost his touch. That means that women who took their time to make money and postpone marriage have to put more effort," Cynthia Wambui Otieno a relationship counselor with Lamead woman confided.

Have class and lack style

For a man to want you, a woman must also put some effort. The greatest mistake that most corporate women make is assuming that they can put their guard down when they are not at their work place.

That means they ditch their miniskirts for some multi colored spandex, cover their Brazilian wigs with some shoddy hat or mavin and what's with the fake leather boots?

"A woman must always look good even when she is going to the shop. She has no excuse. You never know where you will meet the man of your dreams. It's all about impression," Derek Bbanga an Image consultant told us.

Second wife mentality

Women are substantially pickier than men .Deal breakers for women included laziness, disheveled being too needy and bad sex. Gone are the days when women were willing to groom a man into something they would like. We have so many women preferring to be second wives. They however forget that a man's first family will always come first.

Alice Muthoni, a senior education officer, is dating her boss but hardly spends time with her.

"We see each other at the office but that's it. He will come over to my house once in a while but spends more time with his first family," she said.

Her friends on the other hand are too busy with their families and since she does not have one herself, they have no common meeting ground.