A few weeks ago, I wrote two articles on masturbation, self-pleasuring, sexual stimulation of one’s own genitals for sexual arousal or other sexual pleasure. The stimulation may involve objects, sex toys, hands, fingers or a combination.
For some it is a routine of relieving stress, clearing the mind, a way to find good sleep, a pleasure seeking habit that eventually turns into an addiction. The response to these articles has been overwhelming.
It is clear many young men are suffering in silence, not sure what to do. In discovering their sexuality, they got caught up with the addiction. There is hope and yes, one can overcome masturbation.
A reader has requested that I share his testimony. Once, he was caught in the jaws of masturbation but is happy to say he has overcome the addiction. He desires to share his story so that you too can find healing from this deadly habit that will eventually destroy your life and rob you your God-given gift.
“It started as a joke after I finished my high school out of curiosity. Stories, articles and hormones stimuli pressed me on. When I began masturbating, I had no idea I would become addicted nor did I know the consequences it would have in my life.
While in college, a tech-savvy student who owned a phone and laptop, introduced me to porn. At first, I was disgusted but later enticed; it became what I looked forward to watching. I got addicted and from then on, it was what I did every week, eventually every day. I later perfected the act to twice a day. How I enjoyed it!
After college, I continued with the it even when I lived with relatives and did not have any interest in dating, unless it was an opportunity thrown at me for sex. I spent hours alone in the house, in my bedroom, in the bathroom, in bed, every time I had an opportunity to be alone; masturbation was the name of the game! It was my friend, companion and yes I did enjoy it greatly.
Although I enjoyed the process, it left me feeling ashamed, guilty and afraid of being caught. When I attempted to engage with women, I was abusive. It became uncontrollable and I must admit it is the worst thing that has ever happened to me.
When I eventually married, because it is the noble thing to do when a man is of age, I did not stop, my wife could not satisfy my thrust, so the bathroom became my favorite spot and I did it before showering every day. My marriage was on the rocks, my life devastated, my shame and guilt overwhelming. I had nowhere to turn.
When I came to the realization that my body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, I began my healing journey. I would like to share the following tips with you who is struggling;
1. Don’t spend time in the bathroom alone, leave the door open and communicate when you are in there for accountability. Whatever you do avoid being alone when you know that you are vulnerable.
2.Don’t watch soap operas and movies with sexual content or read romantic books that will stretch your imagination. Read edifying personal development material.
3.Whatever you do, say no to watching porn for it is a killer of self-esteem, self-worth and eventually relationships.
4. Your body is a temple of the holy spirit, honor it.
5. Have accountability and acknowledge. Seeking help is not a weakness. It is a strength.
James has totally recovered from his addiction because he chose to. Have you chosen to? Whatever you do, don’t be in denial for too long. Acknowledge what you are going through and purpose to work on it. If you need support, seek it.
Life is good. Live, love and thrive because you deserve it!!