Confessions: He flirts with me on work Zoom calls but he's never suggested a one-on-one

Dear Coleen,

I’m a woman in my 20s and all through lockdown, one of my male colleagues has been shamelessly flirting with me. Our office had a few after-hours Zoom sessions where we had a drink and a laugh, and this guy was quite openly coming on to me.

A few of my female colleagues said it was clear that he really fancied me.

However, he has never made a move – he's not even suggested having a one-to-one video call or phone call, so I’m a bit confused.

As far as I know he’s single and roughly the same age as me, so what would be stopping him from making a move?

Do you think I should do something about it?

I just hope I am reading the signs right!

Coleen says:

Why not? What’s stopping you from taking this matter into your own hands?

In my opinion, it’s always better to go for something than live in limbo, torturing yourself with what ifs?

Maybe he’s not sure how you feel about him and worried about rejection – let’s face it, Zoom isn’t the ideal way to strike up a flirtation.

And if you do get in touch with him directly and it’s clear he’s just a big flirt and not interested in getting together with you, then, yes, it might be disappointing and a bit awkward, but those feelings would soon go, giving you the chance to move on.

But if other people have noticed his flirting, that should give you some confidence.

Obviously, you don’t have to go there with, “Do you fancy me? Shall we have a date?”

But you could suggest getting to know each other better away from the 'office' and move the friendship on to see if there’s anything between you.