Girl talk: Dear men, I am done playing hard to get

Dearest men, what happened to the good old days when you used to hang around women until they gave the green light to be in a relationship with you? Playing ‘hard to get’ has always been the rule of the game but suddenly, men want to ignore the rule. When a girl beats around the bush the first time, at least try another line before calling it quits.

Sometimes a girl is equally in love with you but she is trying not to look like she would just jump into a relationship as though it was the only thing she was waiting for. Even a tree stands firm at first before giving into pressure and finally being felled by the wind. Who are you to ask once and expect us to yield? You make some of us have 1001 unanswered questions later on. Sometimes we are tempted to run after you and take back our words but we resist because we know how it all ends when we go down that path.

Just the other day, a tall and handsome man I had been eyeing for a while finally asked for my number on social media. At first, I was tempted to send it to him right away in bold type and escorted by several ‘emojis’ waving, smiling and doing the happy dance. But I wasn’t sure how he would take it.

You know some of these men our mothers raised feel like they were all born on a weekend and we are always yearning for their attention. So I restricted myself from sending my number and instead asked politely why he wanted it. Shock on me! One week down the line the man has never bothered to answer me yet I have printed and filed proof that he read the message. Seriously speaking, what wrong did I commit by asking that simple question?

Of course I knew or at least had an idea why he wanted my number but all I wanted to hear was some soothing words to make me feel like a woman. But see, this son of someone just read my message, felt sweet and ignored me! He is probably in another woman’s inbox asking for a phone number. My friend, you will look until you come back and answer me. I was not born to be ignored. By the way, if ever you come back, rest assured the bride price has tripled for ignoring me.

Forgive my disappointment but I am just not sure what men want anymore. Another time, I surrendered my number to a potential suitor sitting next to me during a one week conference and that immediately turned him into a nomad. The number of times he moved seats away from me from that time onwards showed me just how much I ‘failed the test’ by quickly giving him my number. Maybe I should have resisted for a day or two?

Just what do you men want when dealing with a woman? Whatever the case, I am done playing ‘hard to get’. If I like you, I swear I will walk up to you and start a conversation. Okay, I lied; I still don’t have the guts to walk up to a man and tell them I like them. I am, however, no longer strong enough to play ‘hard to get’. As long as the feeling is mutual, trust me, I will jump onto the train before it even stops to pick me up.

But if you aren’t ready for a ‘yes’ answer, I advise that you maintain a 30-metre distance from me. I am never going to allow any man to take me up the lift to the 20th floor then expect me to go down alone using wings. I hereby put it in black and white. If you are going to take me up, be sure to bring me down using the same means.

I am not saying that you marry me by force, all I am saying is don’t approach me if you are part of the temptations that Satan is sending my way.