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Hi Chris,
I’m in a long-distance relationship because my boyfriend had to relocate for work. And I’m finding it very hard. I don’t feel emotionally close any more or feel involved in his day. Will it all work out in the end?
Long Distance Relationship
Hi Long Distance Relationship!
Maintaining a relationship with someone who’s a plane ride away is always difficult, especially as there’s no way to be sure that you’re both being faithful.
It helps to get a really good internet connection so you can talk as if you were in the same room. Be positive whatever you’re discussing, and remember that misunderstandings are more common online than in real life.
Set your phones to share your locations, so you both know exactly where you are, 24/7. You don’t like the sound of that? Best reconsider the whole relationship, then. Because you won’t succeed unless you’re 100 per cent open with one another.
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It’s easy to forget what you’re both doing, so set up an online calendar to keep track of visits, anniversaries, planned phone calls and times you’re not available. There’s nothing worse than when one of you’s calling in the middle of something that can’t be interrupted.
Visit every chance you get, including meeting halfway occasionally, if that’s possible. And remember that you HAVE to be there for each other if one of you is in trouble. So make sure that both of you can always be reached, and be prepared to support one another if needed.
You must have a plan to be united again in the future. Because long-distance relationships that don’t, almost always fail. Slowly, you start drifting apart as your interests, values and friends change, until something small blows up and knocks everything off course.
Do things together besides the usual phone calls, like reading the same book and discussing the plot. Tell each other everything. Ask for advice. Set up special ringtones for each other, and save things like boarding passes, beer mats and photos. Until one day you’re finally together again.
All the best,
Chris
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