The worst Christmas mistake husbands make.

The festive season is here with us and with it comes the expenses whose effects are felt in January.

Women will be up and down trying to fulfill promises they made to their children in the course of the year. Men, on the other hand, will be trying hard to evacuate their wives and children from their homes in town to their rural homes promising to join them later in vain.

Why would you send your wife and children to your parents back home for Christmas holidays while you stay put in town only to make a technical appearance on Christmas day and sneak back to town blaming it on a busy schedule? Then as if that is not enough, you appear after New Year broke as ever to transport your family back to the city or wherever.

As much as your wives would love to be with your parents, your presence there gives it a whole new meaning. There's really no point of sending your wife and children to your parents to keep them company over the holidays in your absence and yet her parents are bored to death on the other end. If you are too busy for your own parents don't assume your wife is too.

Unlike many moons away where the family bond was always intact, these days, not only are parents too busy for themselves but for their children too. Gone are the days when women would comfortably sit in the house and wait for their husbands to provide for them. With the wind of change blowing swiftly, women have learnt the art of going out there and working hard to earn a living as well.

Career parents barely have family time. They go to work as usual and after work, go to classes to further their education. They get back home too late and tired to spend quality time with their children. Weekends are never any different, classes, work and more classes. This trend goes on and on all through the year. The only time they have some spare time to bond is during the long festive holidays. This is why it beats logic to send your wife and children to your parents in your absence to bond. They need to bond with you more than with your parents. If you have to send them to your parents, then at least go with them. If not, then take them wherever you will be.

Many years back, our parents were never too busy to have family time. It was like our families were in a bonding session all year round. So when Christmas came, it was more of a new clothes and shoes affair other than a bonding affair. It never really mattered how, where and who you spent the holidays with as long as you were wearing some new clothes and shoes. No one felt short-changed during the whole affair. This was because the family bond was tighter and everyone at peace. We all looked forward to Christmas holidays.

Right now, many wives dread the holidays because of what comes with it. With the many adverts on our televisions about the many adventurous places we can visit during the holidays, as a wife, you can only sit back and hope your children do not fall in love with those destinations. Not when your husband is planning to send you to his parents without him.

It doesn't really matter whether you drive us home in a state-of-the-art machine or you make sure we have all the material things we need while there. All we are asking for is your presence. You cannot be busy throughout the year while on duty and still be busy while off duty. Do not even try to use the insecurity excuse to send us home alone. If it is insecure for the children and I, then it is definitely insecure for you too.

Please don't get me wrong. I am not saying your wives don't love your parents, they do. Only that they need you more around them during this season when you are not on duty. The children might be happy about travelling and the new environment, but if this goes on year in year out, then you will wake up one morning to find no connection with your family. Let us work together and use this chance to strengthen the family we overlook all year round. I wish all couples the best as the countdown begins!

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