It pays to have interest in your 'sponsor's' hobbies

A smart move does not start and end with a girl enlisting in a sugar daddy’s ‘sponsorship programme’. However, continually enhancing her skills to remain relevant in the ‘programme’ does it.

There are lots of girls who pretend to follow their ‘sponsors’’ and boyfriends’ hobbies. That is good. I would say that is being strategic as this means you have something in common to talk about, apart from your rent and upkeep, you know.

But it will be wise if these girls took a keen interest in their ‘sponsors’’ hobbies so that the ‘sponsorship programme’ can be enjoyable time, beyond the four walls of the bedroom. If, for instance, your ‘sponsor’ is a football fan, please, for heaven’s sake, take some initiative and learn the rules of the game.

I mean, it is embarrassing for your ‘sponsor’ to take you along to a fancy sports pub on an important day when  Arsenal FC is playing Manchester United FC or Chelsea FC and you keep asking why one player is not moving from one position! My dear, get to know what a goalkeeper’s role in football is.

Or you look at the minutes and you scream goodness me its only 16 minutes, when will it get to a 100? Do you know the kind of pain you subject your ‘sponsor’ with such talk? You might not notice it, but his boys in the group will exchange knowing glances. The next time your ‘sponsor’ is having drinks with the boys they will laugh at you and him until the cows come home.

You can imagine the teases. “You guys do not discuss anything else apart from erm...?” Another will add: “Man, your girl has an enhanced bosom, but only if half of it would have been the brain!” Amid all these, your ‘sponsor’ will remain flustered and embarrassed unable to defend you or himself.

The other day, a pal of mine, a generous ‘sponsor’, arrived at one of his ‘sponsorship programme’ outreach ‘office’ after mid night. He had been watching a mid-week night football match. The lady, keen to impress and start a conversation asked in a sleepy voice: “What were the scores?” The ‘sponsor’ answered “nil-nil”. The girl continued to probe: “Eh, okay. So which team was first to score?” The ‘sponsor’ lost his mojo. Look, this is football we are talking about. The most popular and commonly regarded to as the poor man’s game. So what will the girls say when we move to tennis or squash? Will you go and start asking why they are playing with a guava instead of a real ball?

Or will you go asking why they are using a hard fishing net to hit the guava when you know they are people lacking proper fishing nets at the lakeside? Suppose your ‘sponsor’ plays golf or polo? I shudder to think of the conversation that the girls would have at the side-lines.

Girls, it pays to invest a little bit in learning a few things here and there prior to engaging your mouth. For the mouth has no reverse gear, just dented image and pride.