Seven ways to avoid fighting with your partner over money

 

One of the top reasons for divorce and separation in relationships is having financial squabbles.

According to Investopedia, once the bills are covered, each spouse can spend what they have left as they see fit. It sounds like a reasonable plan but the process often builds resentment over the individual purchases made. It also divides the spending power, eliminating much of the financial value of marriage.

While there are pros and cons of joining forces financially to meet bills if one partner comes into the marriage with big financial problems including hefty debt or bad credit, that can turn the relationship sour. In these instances, it can sometimes be better to separate accounts while the indebted spouse works on their finances.

Whatever the case, it is a touchy subject that needs to be discussed.

Here are some tips on how to avoid fighting over money with the one you love. Follow these and you just might save your relationship or marriage.

Do not avoid the money talk

A lot of married couples argue more over money than they do about house chores, what to have for dinner or time spent together. This is because most avoid the money talk as they find it dreadful. It is important to set time apart every week to have a conversation with your partner about finances. This is so you are on the same page.  You should discuss everything from investments, budgets, previous spending habits and future spending habits.

Do not share every penny

Having a joint bank account is important in a relationship as it fosters teamwork and a sense of trust. However, it is important not to share every penny. This is because it can lead to blaming between partners, secrets and even distrust. Always have some money set aside for each partner to spend as they want, no questions asked.

Do not let one person do the budget

Whether it is a one income household, or you are both earning an income, it is important to make sure that not one person is left handling the budget. This is so as to avoid leaving one person in the dark about finances. It will also discourage distrust between couples. Sometimes fights are just because one partner does not understand what is happening with the finances. Both partners should be involved in making the financial decisions.

Recognize your differences

It is important to realize that you both have differences whether it be in personality or in spending habits. Relationships are basically two people who have been raised differently coming together. You both have different goals and have had different experiences with money in the past. Understand this about your partner and realize that it takes time and patience to get on the same page.

Have a financial advisor

You might think that hiring a financial advisor is an unnecessary cost but not getting one might end up costing you more money. Having a financial coach might save you more money down the road. A financial advisor also comes in handy in diffusing the uncomfortable and tense conversations that might come up regarding money. Having a third party on this is always a plus.

Budget

Having a budget drawn up will ensure that both you and your partner are on the same page. It is also a great way to offer financial truth in your relationship. You can always go back and examine past spending whether it’s on entertainment, groceries or even saving up for retirement.

Do not blame your partner

Whatever may have happened in the past, leave it there. Blaming your partner for past spending can never have a positive outcome. Make sure to approach such topics with a lot of kindness and patience, instead of jumping on each other’s throats. Bringing up past money disputes will only hurt and will not help the conversation.