Wives are typically extravagant. Often, as the man of the house, you must rein in their wastefulness, and help them make sane decisions.
Since the economy is in the toilet and things are not about to get better, you have come up with the new rules, lest you run broke too soon.
First, there is no taking children to the amusement parks or in the malls where people pay exorbitantly for kids to jump on sand. Those things cost so much. Spending Sh3,000 every weekend is not sustainable.
Kids ought to play, but now you will have to settle for cheaper options.
Either Caroline settles for Uhuru Park amusement parks, or the neighbourhood bouncing castle.
Better still, there is City Park and Uhuru Gardens where the little girl can cycle, or jog. It is healthier. You can visit a mall or fancy places once every two months.
Secondly, the rule that you have already enforced is no junk food. Junk food is unhealthy, yet so expensive. There is still some resistance, but you are firm on this, and it helps Caroline knows that it is a line she can’t cross.
Thirdly, you have summoned her to justify the money she uses on cosmetics. It didn’t go down with her.
“It is my money, dude, what is wrong with you?”
She called you dude. That means it caught her the wrong way.
“But you use too much, and I have seen your receipts, you need to find alternatives.”
“I am an adult, don’t treat me as if I am a child…”
“True, but you can still find cheaper and affordable alternatives…”
She left rudely and went to the bedroom, but your point was home. You followed her to the bedroom to remind her what is next on the chopping board: her quarterly vacation.
Fourth. She will only go for one vacation this year, unlike the many that she goes to every year.
“It is my money I spend, leave me alone…”
“I won’t leave you alone if we go broke, we go broke as a family…And I will be responsible…”
“Then make your money, if you want us to have a joint account, let’s have one, but don’t ever lecture me on how I spend my money.”
“Caroline, this lecture is all about encouraging you to spend your money wisely. I know it is yours, but come on, don’t you think you are wasteful.”
She went back to her phone. A clear indication that she wanted you to mind your own freaking business.
But you sleep easy knowing she knows the rules. She can protest, but she can’t break them.
Also, pastors need to remind women that there is no such thing as “my money” when they are married. Husbands should be custodians of family money.
Women are consumeristic and can be wasteful, and sometimes they can be misled by commercials and “sales” into buying things they don’t want or need. You hope she understood.
@nyanchwani
snyanchwani@gmail.com
How long can you last without your phone?