Tips to help you resolve sibling rivalry at home

As the coronavirus quarantine continues to haunt everyone and staying in the house is becoming more and more unbearable.

This frustration seems to be bringing out the true colours in everyone, this is no exception to children spending all their days and nights in the house after schools were shut down.

As a parent, you may find it very hard to maintain order in your house especially when your children are constantly fighting and reporting each other to you.

Although it is normal for children to pick on each other and compete, it is important to promote cooperation amongst them because some of these fights may graduate and continue into their adult life.

Anticipate sibling rivalry but ensure your children maintain a healthy sibling relationship.

Here are ways you can help resolve sibling rivalry while home:

Have a list of rules and chores schedule

Just like in school, children know the rules that govern them and they understand the consequences of breaking these rules.

Some of these rules can apply in the house, like no fighting or no bullying younger siblings.

When there are consequences like being grounded all day without their video games or watching movies, children will follow rules because they fear boredom.

Another important aspect to check on is chores. Most children will fight one another because they are lazy or do not just want to participate in house chores.

When you have a timetable for who does what, it is not easy for them to point fingers at each other because you will clearly know who among them is slacking on their duties.

Do not show favoritism

As a parent, you should always be aware of the fact that children live most of their lives striving to please you. When you openly show your preference to one child over another, that’s a recipe to disaster.

You can have a favourite child, the one who obviously doesn’t give you a hard time, but before their little eyes you should always come out as a fair parent to all of them.

When solving disputes and you have a favourite, this attribute will always be brought to test. Always stay calm and objective when solving a dispute between your children. This way you can find the root of the problem and solve the issue amicably.

However, you need to remember that when solving disputes amongst your children, you do not strive for fairness, but doing the right thing.

Understand your children individually

The biggest mistake you can do as a parent is comparing your children. They are not the same and huddling them all together and expecting same results is not fair.

Some children are outgoing and go getters while others keep to themselves and you really have to push your way in to get any information from them.

When you learn and understand where their individual strengths are, you can easily anticipate the kind of fights they might have and who is likely to report to you or exaggerate a misunderstanding.

Remember to always give your children individual attention. Personally take time to ask each of them how they are doing or what’s new in their lives.

Do not cloud the concerns and be satisfied with a unison answer from them. Children want your attention, so pay attention to each of them.

Make them feel special in their own individual way.

Give them personal space and personal items

In most cases children will fight when they constantly spend a lot of time with each other and share a lot of personal items like toys they both love.

It is enough that they have to probably share a room and for some a bed. When it comes to playtime try to ensure they do not cross each other’s lines all the time.

Not all children are the same, one might be a clean freak who loves their stuff put and done in a certain way, while the other might be carefree and anything goes.

Trapping children with such diverse characters together all the time, is likely to create a lot of tension and fights amongst them.

Have a family meeting tradition

Whether you decide on having weekly family meetings or daily ones at the end of each day, a family meeting is a good way for all family members to openly talk about their frustrations and point out issues bothering them.

It may seem insignificant, but when a child has a place they know they can vent out their issues and be heard, fights are likely to reduce since everyone will fear their inequities being known by the whole family.

A family meeting also helps you solve disputes with your spouse present. This way you don’t feel overwhelmed and frustrated solving issues all by yourself. These meetings can also promote family unions in the long run.