Chantelle: Why J Blessing and I broke up

Pulse: Can you confirm the big rumour in town?

Chantelle: There are so many things that the blogs have written about J Blessing and I. Like separating and divorcing, I cheating on him and all that. Which particular rumour do you want me to clarify?

P: It is one and the same thing, right?

C: It is not. For starters, yes, we are no longer living together so obviously that means we are separated. Two, we were never married. Never! And three, I have never cheated on J Blessing for the five years we have known each other. Now, that is the bottom line.

P: Let’s get somethings right first. You have moved out of J Blessing’s house?

C: I have moved out and I am living with a friend, a long-time girlfriend.

P: And you say you were never married?

C: True. The blogs married us up, we never did it. We have been together for five years as an engaged pair. Forget matters of law as we have been on and off the affair but this is nothing I want to bring out now. There is no day we officiated our love affair and I can tell you, there is no day J Blessing has gone to visit my parents to ask for my hand in marriage. That does not mean that our parents didn’t know about our relationship. The only time I took him home he only went as a friend and that was all.

P: Why wouldn’t he if you were both in love and would wish, five years on, to be married?

C: That is a big question and I can only say as much. J Blessing would be in and out of the country like every time because of studies and work and that means for the most time, our relationship was a like a long-distance relationship. At the same time, we had differences and we would be on-and-off. The truth is that from the start, we never really jelled together as we are two different people who were trying to hold on hoping that at some point this would work.

P: Are you saying you were never happy together?

C: Not really. Sometimes we would be happy. Other times we would be sad. We kept on talking about it as I asked him to let go if he didn’t feel happy with me but these conversations were short. This is something both our families do know as we had discussions over the issue and they even advised that we can let each be if we felt uncomfortable being together. His father is a pastor and he would always advise us from a sober Biblical view. Both sides were for us breaking up.

P: What would you say about a man you have known for five years, lived with and even had a child with?

C: J Blessing is a good person and he is someone I loved. I want him to be happy and get someone who makes him happy. As for the people who keep on saying that these differences came from the issue on our baby I would say you’d better be sensitive about such matters. That is a sleeping angel. Allow our son to rest. We have never spoken about him and we are not about to.

P: You are very sure this has nothing to do with his other rumoured relationships and ex-girlfriends...and yours too?

C: Not at all. People always talked and we always discussed and decided what was good for us as lovers.

P: And it is not about the whole ‘religion’ issue?

C: Well, I don’t fake my life and J Blessing knows it. He is a Christian, right. My relationship with God is as personal as anyone else.

P: What are your parents advising about this and what have you decided as way forward with J Blessing?

C: My parents want to see me happy. Period. As for J Blessing, I don’t know if he has moved on. It is now coming to six years and what I have gone through is enough lesson that nothing can change at this point. Sometimes you feel so caged and the results of that are what other people judge you around. Simply, I have let go and I wish J Blessing every good in life.