A guide on getting free drinks from men in a club

My favourite type of drink is a free drink! I am thankful I was born a girl because the one thing I am assured of is that I can still get drunk as a skunk, even when I am dead broke. Thanks to the longstanding belief that women lose all their inhibitions and become sluts when intoxicated, women the world over will still be getting free drinks for years to come.

Kenyan women are particularly notorious for freeloading on drinks at the bar! More power to us. However, I am a bit alarmed by the number of cases I am hearing of unsuspecting women being left with massive bills after the guys they expected to pick up their tabs run off or flatly refuses to pay.

Like I said, I love a free drink just as much as the next girl, but I would never be caught dead in such a situation.

I am way too smart for that. I choose my targets very wisely. In order to be successful and save yourself from that mortifying situation, you need to keep these three things in mind when trying to score free drinks:

1. Never assume a guy will just pick up your tab

The recurring theme in all those stories about women being embarrassed after trying to get free drinks from men is that they assumed the men would pay for them because they are men and that’s what men do.

Never assume that even if you are seated at the same table. Unless he offers to buy you the drink, assume you are paying for it yourself and drink within your price range

 

2. You have a better chance of success if you go it alone.

Nobody likes to hit the clubs alone. However, if you are looking to get drunk for free, being alone increases your chances tenfold. In many of the stories that have been making rounds on social media about girls being left with the bill, there was more than one girl. A man invites you for a drink and you decide to bring your squad. It is in very bad taste, especially if you don’t have the decency to warn him in advance.

Bringing friends along with you works against you in two ways. First, remember that this guy is only buying you drinks because he thinks there is a chance he will get lucky at the end of the night. When you show up with three of your friends, he knows for a fact that he is going home with blue balls so why should he bother splurging cash on drinks for you? Secondly, as you probably know since you are freeloading on drinks, alcohol in bars doesn’t come cheap. He will be more willing to buy drinks for one girl than for four girls.

 

3. Target the guys getting bottle service

Pro tip: The chap at the counter nursing two beers isn’t likely to shell out his hard earned money for top shelf liquor for you and your pals. He might offer to buy you a cocktail or two but if you are looking to get properly buzzed, get off the counter and head for the tables. That’s where the real money is.

I remember sometime back my friend and I went to a popular bar and we couldn’t get anywhere to seat. I looked around and spotted three guys at a booth drinking expensive stuff. I asked the waiter to ask them if we could join them.

They agreed. As soon as we sat down they told us we were welcome to pour ourselves drinks from their expensive bottles. It was a very good night. We drank ourselves into a stupor and didn’t spend a dime!

What’s more, they didn’t even hassle us for sex afterwards. After we had had enough, we thanked them for their generosity and left.

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