At the beginning of the year, I usually attempt to go vegetarian, eating more fresh and raw fruit and vegetables for at least three weeks in an attempt to recover from the unbridled hogging that marks the end of year festivities.
I love my meat, but I love my body more. There is sufficient evidence that meat is a conduit for a host of diseases that lead to death by lifestyle.
Which is why I remain in the occasional meat eater category.
Some vegan health experts have said that occasional meat eaters have a 20% reduced rate of dying of heart disease and a 10% reduced rate of overall mortality.
I take my chances with a carrot a day. My January diet is a simple get-my-healthy-back plan but it is never received well in the social circles.
I have walked in the shoes of a vegan and I can attest that surviving as a vegetarian in the land of nyama fry, kuku choma, sausage mbili and mutura is hard.
Honey glazed pork
Becoming a vegan gives you that holier than thou air, like getting saved used to sound before Bishop Deya hit the scene.
It comes across as uppity and vain. “What person with teeth, turns down honey glazed pork chops?”
It is less offensive to lie that you had a late and heavy lunch and agree to a small bite. There is no point being a difficult guest at your in-laws.
Vegetarians also do not make good drinking company.
Just as everyone is gearing up to cut the meat, the vegan will wear that guilty look that forces everyone to surrender their kachumbari to him.
Important guests
In many parts of this country, a strict vegetarian would simply starve. If you do not eat meat someone will offer you chicken or fish.
In many households, when meat is prepared, vegetables take a back seat, mainly serving as dressing for the plate.
Vegetables are foods to be hidden when important guests come knocking lest they think you are poor.
The status of meat at the top of the delicacy hierarchy is secure. It is even coded in the language.
No one in a restaurant ever says, “I want a juicy salad and a bit of steak”.
A vegetarian diet is prejudiced as plain, bland food that leaves one feeling dull and joyless.
My advice. If you want to be a contented vegetarian in Kenya, learn how to cook and practice spontaneous fasting.
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