If she asks for money early in the relationship, run!

A couple arguing over money [iStockphoto]

I have seen several women online brag about how they put off men by asking them for money.

Once a man shows interest in a woman and the chase begins, the woman’s trick is to ask him for money. According to them, this is to gauge the man’s seriousness.

However, more often than not, the man looks for the next exit, leaving the lady looking over her shoulders because she can’t spot him in the rearview mirror on the highway.

The chase was cut off by money.

It might look hilarious to the ladies sharing this because they are not disappointed, they had low expectations on the man anyway.

If they were disappointed in losing out, they wouldn’t have shared. However, any lady who still hopes to get a man and settle down should not try this at home.

Why would a man bolt out when asked for money a few days into a relationship, or in the early days of the chase?

The ladies who were laughing at this scenario did not ask for airtime or some little money.

The good amount of cash was more a statement of their class. Telling the man early on that this is my rate card, if you can keep up then prove yourself.

The middle-level ladies will say the now common joke of her cooking gas has run out. Most men will not have a problem with sorting the gas bill.

The lady must eat to stay in the proverbial relationship market. The amount is also not that high for a man who has fully swallowed the lady’s allure.

The challenge comes when the lady asks for her car fuel tank to be filled and anything above that.

We all know how people who drive follow the ERC monthly announcement on fuel price adjustments. Cars driven by most men experience full tank twice a year, over Easter and Christmas when he is driving out of town.

When a lady asks for a full fuel tank, the man’s nervous system gets the shock his fuel tank gets just before Christmas. Fight or flight mode is sent to the brain and he has to decide if he will fight for the girl or flee.

When you ask a man for money, several things come to mind. Is the lady struggling or she can comfortably sort her bills?

The former can be handled if they ask for money. The latter will then be handled differently.

Is she on her 304 phase, the whoring phase most ladies must go through to grasp their sexuality?

In this case, he wonders how many men get to be asked for money now that the lady is beautiful enough to warrant his attention. It does not matter what model of car she drives, he will conclude some rich man is holding the log book somewhere between Karen and Langata.

The other conclusion that is drawn quickly is that you have said “NO”, note the caps. Asking for money translates to rejection because men know that when a woman likes you, she doesn’t ask for money.

Even the “fare-orceous” ones who live on “eating” money for fare from men have that one man they do not ask for fare. They avail themselves happily at their cost and sometimes with some decent shopping.

Asking for money means that the girl has rated you below her target market.

Those who opt out believe that it is better to engage a commercial sex worker if money must come before anything in the chase.

If the man doesn’t bail out, then he is in it for a transactional-based relationship. He will decide to spend the money but the woman must be ready to give in to his demands.

The only catch is once he feels like he has picked what is commensurate to his investment, he will opt out. When that time comes then no one is expected to harbour emotional hang-ups.

For every woman who puts a man off by asking for money, there are always four others who bid their time to evaluate and engage the man in the romantic dance. The worst are those who push a man into the friend zone.

The main aim is to enjoy companionship and social support without responsibilities. If you went in for the chase, settling for the friend zone is simping. In that case, the ladies who ask for money are a better deal.

The common belief is that women can multi-task and while at it have a strong sixth sense.

The kind of inbuilt radar that helps them pick anomalies. The problem is this radar doesn’t detect men prone to hit and run or con men out to swindle their money.

The truth is, when a man activates the right codes in the heart of a woman, she will not ask for money.

The market is dirty. As someone else is taking a good shower for another chance at the dating game, others have given up on love. The market can be dirty.