Kenya: A teacher from a school in Bomet County might get into history books for breaking the record of ridicule. He was not caught in the ‘usual’ teacher mischief of locking up young girls in some dingy room or the ‘common’ teacher sin of ‘eating’ school money. In this case the said high school teacher ran away with cooked meat at a local bar.
The teacher who is aptly nicknamed Chemosi because of his huge frame and an equally huge appetite for anything meat, had gone to the local bar after a hard day’s work at the school supervising exams. Unfortunately for Chemosi, he was a bit low on cash and had to employ time-tested tricks to get enough drinks to get his massive body high. He achieved this by swallowing a strong spirit at a go, those who drink call it ‘kupiga tach’, before ordering a bottle of beer ‘ya kutandaza’ the spirit.
Chemosi also positioned himself next to the few ‘philanthropic drinkers’ who did not disappoint because they kept on throwing a bottle in his direction while he kept them busy with ‘learned’ opinion about whatever topic they delved into. The subjects ranged from Karen land saga to Pesa Mashinani and the usual men topics about women, where Chemosi is an expert.
Alcohol and meat go together and every drinking joint should have a place to sate the patrons’ carnivorous habits. As expected, Chemosi’s philanthropic drinkers ordered for a huge piece of boiled and another roasted piece. The roast meat was ready in no time but the leader gave fresh instructions to the cook to add a glass of water, a little chili or a piece of onion to the ‘boilo’.
Every time the instructions were given, a round would be ordered and since Chemosi kept alternating beer and strong spirits, he was getting drunk faster than the meat could be eaten.
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Chemosi took the meaty issue into his hands. He walked to the kitchen located at the exit of the bar and told the cook to wrap the roast meat in a polythene bag. He told the cook that he was dropping the meat in the leader’s car but instead walked straight to his house in the school compound where he ate to his fill.
The group was shocked to find their meat gone. The philanthropic drinkers’ leader didn’t take long to assemble a group of over twenty young men to accompany him to find Chemosi the next morning.
The commotion caused by the group attracted students preparing for assembly. The learners were excited to see the often strict Chemosi being frog-marched with huge pieces of meat hanging around his neck. On learning that the teacher had stolen meat, the students went excited and they cheered and frog marched teacher to the school gate.