The Standard Group Plc is a multi-media organization with investments in media
platforms spanning newspaper print
operations, television, radio broadcasting, digital and online services. The
Standard Group is recognized as a
leading multi-media house in Kenya with a key influence in matters of national and
international interest.
On arriving in Kenya, the expatriate’s first experience of the famed ‘Kenyan courtesy’ will be some chap or woman at the Jomo Kenyatta International Airpoor (that wasn’t a typo, by the way).
This glorious edifice is home to ‘The Pride of Africa’ and a collection of people who might or might not love their employment.
Whichever airline you chose, you will have just finished your in-flight meal of Salmonella with Rice, and you’re keen to visit the local lavatories in order to void yourself of this dish. However, you must first pass through the Passport Control section, in order to deposit some slip informing the Kenyan government of the purpose of your visit. Being an expatriate, the honest answer to this question would be, ‘I’m here to idle for two years’, but you can’t write this, so instead you write, ‘Employment as a UN advisor’.
The queue for the passport check is long, ill-defined and a little ill-tempered, bearing in mind that it’s composed of people who’ve been flying for hours, and who, depending on the time of day, want to either sleep or have a breakfast that isn’t going to flood them with diarrhoea. But that must wait. A woman takes your passport, doesn’t speak to you, and eye-nudges you to place your finger on some sort of fingerprint recognition device. You are then allowed through. Reasonably painless, but not friendly.
And yet, although your instinct, my dear expatriate colleague, is to grimace and moan about the ‘service’ to everyone you later meet, be they Kenyan or equally expat, you are advised to first reflect a little. Two things need bearing in mind. Firstly, this uncomfortable experience was the temporary gateway to what lies ahead of you: more ‘white privilege’ in every area of life than most Kenyan citizens enjoy. From this moment on, you will be waved through roadblocks, smiled at by every private-sector employee from Mombasa to Kisumu, and nuzzled by beauties. For, however vile your character might be, or however unseemly long and therefore unattractive to Kenyans your nose is, the ridiculous myth of ‘white excellence’ will follow you everywhere. Don’t forget: drossy former settler white aristocrats, even today, shoot and kill Kenyans, and ultimately go back to the privilege they had before.
The second reason you should pause before complaining, is this: your Heathrow, Charles de Gaulle or JFK airports are even more unfriendly to their less white visitors, who often have to jump through ridiculously offensive hoops to get visas in the first place, who are met with even grimmer faces at Immigration, and who, on arriving in, say, Britain, have to endure the miseries of both the weather and the broken-spirited people.
In short, do this: enter the country, do your two years of idling, enjoy it and contribute to society where you can, and this without being patronising. Then, on returning to the UK, don’t either moan or, certainly, write some god-awful book entitled, ‘How I Saved East Africa Through Hugs’. Got it?
