Most treasured body assets

By Brenda Kageni

Following recent developments in the news, quite a number of men are feeling threatened for their body parts, in life and in death, now that some goons have decided to hawk their sehemu nyetis in the black magic market for a measly 50 gees. Why the witchdoctors prefer that part of the male anatomy is anyone’s guess.

May be it is man’s most treasured possession. You would guess so from the way they seem to protect it every time. Just look at a picture of a penalty shot and you will guess where all the men’s hands will be covering.

Same thing when a man is roughing you up. A woman will always know where to press to earn their freedom.

For women, several parts of their anatomy seem precious. Let’s start with the hair. It starts raining and most women worth their name will scamper to safety or unleash all manner of head covers — you’d be blamed for thinking they are made of dust and are therefore afraid of disintegrating on water impact. But it is their hair they are protecting.

celebs insure body assets

Then look at the hairdresser’s bill every two weeks and you will get the picture.

Women also seem attached to their boobs. If people flaunt what they love, then the amount of cleavage in town is a good indicator of what we women love in our bodies. But anyway, the worth of these goodies is known. Not only do they provide food for our babies, they also have a way of getting men’s focus off the really important things, right from childhood.

Ask Dolly Parton. She had hers insured at around Sh80 million, just in case.

Down on that list, I will add the bum. Rumour has had it that JLo has hers insured at Sh2.16 million. The truth is that women may not love their bums or think them that great, until they realise they tantalise passer-bys. Then they get to treasure them, protect them and leverage their power. Yet for others, it is their legs that catch the eye of the public. Look at Mariah Carey. Ever since Gillette signed them up for the "Legs of a Goddess" campaign, they are now valued at Sh80 billion. Heidi Klum too thinks her legs are national treasure. She has her right leg insured at Sh96 million and her left at about Sh80 million.

Ugly Betty’s Star America Ferrera has her bright smile insured at Sh800 million.

As for me, what do I treasure? Probably the part that would get me fastest to the doctor at the slightest sign of its malfunction. You can guess.