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The Nairobian

Mastering emotions key to living happily

Wellness

By Esther Muchene | Jul 09, 2024

Emotions are a part of life, they make us human. Deadlines loom, relationships demand attention and external pressures constantly vie for our focus.

Emotional regulation, as defined by Dr James Gross, a leading researcher in the field refers to "the processes by which individuals influence which emotions they have, when they have them, and how they experience and express these emotions."

In essence, it is about gaining control over the emotional storm brewing within and directing it towards a more constructive path.

While it may not be easy to do so every time, the benefits of mastering emotional regulation are far-reaching. Studies have shown that individuals with strong emotional regulation skills experience lower levels of stress, anxiety and depression.

They are also better equipped to build and maintain healthy relationships, manage conflict effectively and achieve their goals. In the workplace, emotional regulation translates to improved decision-making, stronger leadership skills and enhanced team dynamics.

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The first step towards emotional regulation is cultivating self-awareness. Pay attention to your body's physical cues such as increased heart rate, sweating or muscle tension which can be early signs of heightened emotions.

Channel those emotions through mindfulness practices such as journaling or even calling a close friend. This can also help you identify your emotional triggers and understand their root causes.

When faced with a challenging situation, challenge those negative thought patterns that might be fueling a strong emotional response first. Ask yourself, "Is this the most helpful or best way to look at this situation?"

Once you are feeling more centred emotionally, run to your coping mechanisms to manage those difficult emotions. This could be working out, removing yourself physically from that space, spending time in nature or engaging in relaxation exercises can all be effective ways to calm yourself down and regain control.

If you are unable to stay on top of your emotions, don't be afraid to seek support from close friends and family members you trust. Talking about your struggles and challenges in a safe space can provide valuable insight and equip you with additional tools for navigating your emotional landscape.

Mastering emotional regulation is a lifelong journey. There will be setbacks and moments where emotions take hold. When that happens do not beat yourself over it but show yourself some grace and aim to do better next time.