Buying your child a handset has a positive side

By Veronica Cherop

On my daughter’s eighth birthday, she asked for a mobile phone. I asked what she wanted a phone for, and she innocently said she wanted to play games on it.

 “Why can’t you use mummy’s in the evenings and on the weekend?” I asked as I looked for the best way to discourage this idea.

But she said that her father and I come home late and are busy during weekends. I got off the hook by telling her that her school does not allow mobile phones, and that the gadget would waste most of her study time.

Three years later, she came back with the same request. At eleven, she felt grown up, and wanted a phone to talk to her friends. Do these friends have their own handsets? Yes, she replied.

I knew the time I had dreaded had come: It was time to buy my daughter a phone.

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There is no universal age when the child is old enough to own a phone. You just have to gauge whether they are ready for this responsibility or not.

When the time comes, make sure your child understands that the money has to be got from somewhere — which means they do not ask for a phone then get it the next day.

For instance, the child could promise to forgo some luxuries for a while. An example of this is withdrawing the school bus privilege for a month to save for the phone. This way, the child will take care of the phone better than if you just bought it without much ado.

You could also link the purchase to a certain achievement — such as excelling in exams or doing some chores.

There is also that matter of which phone to buy. Recently, I met a couple whose nine-year-old son has a phone worth Sh70,000. I do not think it is a wise idea to even think about buying a phone that expensive for a child.

If you buy the child a phone that costs between Sh2,500 and Sh10,000, you could save the rest for something more special. (Yes, there are other things more special than a phone.)

After you buy the handset, there is the important issue of airtime. Sit with the child and come up with terms of usage. If you agree to load it with Sh100 of airtime a month, for example, stick to this figure. Once the money is finished, the child should wait until the beginning of the next month for reloading.

In a vital way, this guides the child on planning: By using the airtime economically, the child learns the concept of non-wastage of resources.

As a parent, you must set the rules for phone use. For example, you could say the child should never take the gadget to school and can only use it in the evenings, after homework is done. If the child is in boarding school, the parent could set regulations such as the phone may only be used during the holidays, and no phone calls after 9pm and before 7am.

Before you hand over the phone to your child, ask the mobile provider to block access to porn and other sites unsuitable for minors. Yes, there are children who unblock this safety measure, but I believe if you are open about these things with your child, there is nothing to worry about.