Loud Ichung'wah and his love of throwings jabs for the Big Boss

Anyone meeting National Assembly Majority Leader Kimani Ichung’wah for the first time would likely wonder how such a voice comes out of the man.

Physically, he is not what the cameras imply. He is the kind of person you would assume speaks in a highly pitched tone, not the hoarseness that he is known for.

Long story short, he looks nothing like his voice. Boasting a nearly perfect cylindrical head and dimples, the mheshimiwa for Kikuyu looks nothing like the things he says.

Ichung’wah has previously remarked that he only fears God and uji moto (hot porridge). Perhaps, he needs to repeat that line for people to believe that he is not a man to be bullied. His baby face makes him the perfect candidate for bullying.

Had he gone to any other school besides Alliance High School, he would have been a favourite for the bullies. It is possible that such behaviour does not exist in Kenya’s national schools.

Whatever Ichung’wah lacks in stature, he makes up for with his big office, that of the leader of the government’s business in Parliament. He also has the Big Boss on speed dial. It helps that he has decibels that would put an evangelist to shame.

READ: Petitioners want Ichung'wah, Atwoli summoned over abduction claims

Despite his baby face, Ichung’wah is outdoing Machachari’s Fatso as the “bully wa mtaa”, terrorising critics of President William Ruto. Trans Nzoia Governor George Natembeya found that out days ago when he dared tell off the Big Boss over abductions that are believed to be sanctioned by his government.

He called out the former administrator for raising his voice against elders, accusing him of committing abductions in his previous job, all the while swearing that Natembeya scared him not one bit. So scathing was the attack that sections of politicians from Western Kenya gathered to defend their man, who could not capitalise on his home-ground advantage.

Wounded by the barbs, Natembeya wrote to Ichung’wah seeking an apology to be published in local dailies. The Kikuyu MP did not hesitate to respond, daring Natembeya on.

“Should your client succumb to fantasy and proceed with any misguided action against our client, the same shall be subjected to a high voltage legal counter, at your client’s peril as to costs,” Ichung’wah’s lawyers countered.

“In the fullness of time, the wheels of justice shall eventually roar at your client’s doorstep, and there shall be immense weeping and gnashing of teeth,” the lawyers added.

Before Natembeya, Ichung’wah focused all his attention on former Deputy President Rigathi Gachagua, who he branded a tribalist. After denying several times that there were plans to impeach Riggy G, Ichung’wah came out to champion the process initiated by Kibwezi West MP Mwengi Mutuse.

So committed he was to the cause that he must have featured in Riggy G’s nightmares in the last days of his deputy presidency. Ichung’wah is not completely done with Gachagua. He has accused the former DP of abducting critics of the government.

If the Kikuyu MP had, however, scared Gachagua before, he does not anymore. Few things would scare the guardian of Murima, now that he seems to have earned support from the ground. Riggy G spares no breath for Ruto’s allies such as Ichung’wah, who he has baptised “kibaraka”. All his focus in on his former boss.

On the contrary, Ichung’wah, the man who admits to firing arrows at night, seems the fearful one. While his away game might be on point, he falters at home, where he has been missing since Riggy G’s impeachment.

Nyandarua Senator John Methu recently implored him to come home and tell Gachagua’s allies what he thinks about them in Kikuyu as they struggle with Swahili. That is probably an offer Ichung’wah isn’t interested in.

Before Natembeya and Riggy G, there was former President Uhuru Kenyatta. In the wake of Uhuru’s fallout with Ruto in 2018, Ichung’wah sided with his current master, constantly attacking the former Head of State.

The attacks would continue beyond the 2022 elections. On every platform and at the top of his lungs, Ichung’wah would claim Uhuru was jealous of the new government and was destabilising it by allegedly sponsoring anti-government protests.

That his countless rants went unanswered did not stop him from seeking Uhuru’s attention. He would later prophesy that the properties of those “sponsoring mayhem” would be invaded, days before goons invited themselves for a feast at the Kenyattas’ farm.

Former Prime Minister Raila Odinga carried a target on his back that Ichung’wah loved to aim at. Before he helped Ruto stabilise a ship many were worried would sink, there was no good Raila could do in Ichung’wah’s eyes.

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The former premier is now a darling of Ichung’wah and is often buttered up with words such as “patriot” and “statesman”.

Ichung’wah tried the bullying business with Generation Zs during last year’s revolt against proposed tax hikes. He ridiculed their love for selfies, taxis and fried chicken. But the young Kenyans were not the ones chickening out on June 25, 2024.

Throughout his political career, Ichung’wah has mostly been close to power. He chaired the National Assembly’s Budget and Appropriations Committee before Uhuru’s fallout with Ruto, then the deputy president.

A purge of Ruto’s allies would see him assume the role of the opposition to the “handshake” government. In this strange role, he had warned against the abuse of power as tables can turn. The tables turned and he is back in power.

If asked what he thinks about what he said when he claimed to face political persecution, Ichung’wah would probably counter that only fools don’t change their minds.