This open letter to Boda Boda riders is the best thing you'll read all day

First and foremost I would like to congratulate you for having revolutionised the transport industry in Kenya!

You have bequeathed Kenyans the best gift they could ever ask for - a quick, convenient and affordable mode of transport. You are a transporter, a taxi, an errands boy and occasionally a Good Samaritan. You are only a step away from tele-transportation!

In fact, you have rendered google maps software irrelevant because when Kenyans have visitors all they need to do is to give them your number. To the government, you are Godsend because you have created employment, boosted Kenya’s GDP and brightened the face of the taxman.

The reason I am writing to you is so that we can agree on a few things that have brought tears, pain, disabilities, death and left in their wake widows, widowers and orphans. As I pen this letter, some of you and even your valued customers are in hospitals recuperating from motorcycle related accidents and moulds of fresh graves is a sign all is not well in your boda-boda industry.

Firstly let’s agree that the motorcycle can never and will never be a car. Being a two-wheeler it operates on delicate scientific principles called gravity, balance and heavy dose of common sense! Unlike a car, you don’t have the benefit of a bumper, an airbag, ABS braking system. That explains why your reverend motorcycle costs less 1/8th of a car.

To be exact the price of 2-3 TV sets! The implications are life-threatening - it means that in case of a motorcycle accident your head is the bumper, your knees is the bonnet, your face the windscreen! - need I explain further?

Secondly, I would like us to agree that your motorcycle was never meant for racing- the tread on your tyres means that at speeds of over 40km per hour, you are speeding! Thirdly, I would like us to agree that Kenyans never asked you to be their hero!

For unknown reasons, you have mindlessly chosen to be one - by weaving recklessly in between moving vehicles! Fourthly but not the least is to ask - why all the hatred against motorists? You point a middle finger when cautioned, burn vehicles at accident scenes and collude with colleagues to run away from accident scenes.

Did you know that before the advent of motorcycle transport there was never a boda-boda wing in hospitals? Crossing the road for our children was simple - they now have to look left and right over 6 times in case you run them over.

You have actually rewritten the traffic code but at a great price. So you are allergic to a crash helmet? - the only known cure is a fine or prison term! All Kenyans are asking is that you put your own safety and theirs first!