As birds go, few are quite as intriguing as the ostrich.
Its sheer size makes it an anomaly as we expect a bird to be small — not to tower over us by over a metre.
Its diminutive head sitting comically atop a long, bare worm-like neck. Then there is the fact that it has wings but cannot fly...what was the Creator thinking?
As for its running speed, the ostrich has been known to reach an incredible 72kilometres per hour — on two toes — making it the fastest two-legged animal in the world.
On second thought, those “superfluous” wings do come in quite handy when it needs to make a quick turn to side-step a lion, or to slow down after outrunning it.
On the 250-acre Maasai Ostrich Resort that we visited last weekend in the dry and dusty plains of Kitengela (incorporating the only ostrich farm in Africa north of South Africa), 600 ostriches are being reared for the numerous benefits the fascinating birds provide.
The resort offers an interesting outing for an overnight stay with accommodation in six cottages, each with four separate rooms, at a cost of Sh10,500 full board for two people sharing or stay in the tents at Sh5,000 full board for two people sharing.
Alternatively, make it a day trip during which you can have a quick tour of the farm and hop on an ostrich’s back for a hair-raising ride.
If ostrich riding is not your thing, try a more predictable option with Carmelo and Tyson, the gentle grass-chomping residents who will fulfil your horse riding ambitions at Sh400 for adults and half that for children.
Or simply do the customary Kenyan thing and enjoy a platter of roast meat on the very spacious lawn either by the pool which is informal, or in the well-tended garden on tables with linen settings and gleaming silverware.
Many have woken up to the fact that ostrich meat offers a gourmet as well as a heart-healthy option.
Comparable in appearance and taste to lean beef, its appeal is in the low fat and low cholesterol composition.
Ostrich steak is also highly prized for its richness in iron and calcium.
The optimal stage to slaughter the birds is eight months, when the meat is at its most tender and flavoursome.
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Since the farm follows this protocol, we ordered a mixed grill platter and were delighted by the succulence of our mbuni fillet.
It was, in fact, the star of the platter.
If you are into exotic cuisine, be prepared to fork out Sh3,500 for a single ostrich egg.
According to our guide on the farm tour, this will provide omelette to feed more than 10 people.
The volume is comparable to 24 chicken eggs.
Recommended method: work up a good sweat by shaking the two-kilogramme melon-sized egg to combine yolk and white, drill a hole and pour small quantities of the contents into your pan to fry up single-portion omelettes.
For a healthier option, dust off your biggest pot and boil it, but be prepared to rise with the (other) birds and wait a good couple of hours for the egg to cook!
Remember to enlist your hammer and screwdriver as kitchen utensils to drill into that impossibly hard shell.
Vultures raiding ostrich nests have to fly great heights before dropping the eggs to smash the shell and feast on the contents.
Even the empty shell is valuable as it can sell as an ornament for Sh1,000 or more if decorated.
Ostrich feathers are also profitable. They make pretty hat decorations as well as soft house dusters.
To top it all, ostrich leather produces exotic and pricey shoes, belts, bags, cushion covers and even jewellery.
Hatchery
An ostrich egg takes a mere six weeks (42 days) to hatch and although there was no activity in the hatchery during our visit, we did, however, see the hatched birds at various life stages.
They say that the gender of an ostrich cannot be determined until it is three years old.
Thereafter, the rooster develops black feathers with white wing tips while the hen retains the more drab grey-brown colouring, a clever camouflage strategy for the shared incubating roles.
The hen sits on the eggs by day, blending into the dusty savannah environment while the dark-coloured rooster incubates by night.
The mating season (August to January) is currently in full swing, and we were enthralled as a six-year old rooster launched into its characteristic mating dance of swaying, flapping its wings and winding its neck in a spiral just for us.
Ah yes, the mystery of those wings. They provide quite a display, and also come in handy for shielding chicks from the elements.
The spectacle more than made up for the Sh300 per head fee charged for a farm tour.
The hen’s dance in response is not quite so spectacular, much like her colouring as she will open her wings and allow herself to be led by the male, who struts ahead of her to a private place.
According to our guide, keeping two roosters together is a recipe for disaster.
There will ensue a kicking battle to the death, with the victor stomping on the vanquished male and slashing at his body using its peculiar two-toed feet and hoof-like, but lethal, razor-sharp claws.
The bird-brained giants take up relatively little land and do not eat that much.
In captivity they survive, literally, on chicken feed in addition to the seeds, foliage and bugs they scratch out of the ground, and can enjoy the lifespan of a human and up to the proverbial three score and ten (70) years during which they continue to be productive.
Aspiring ostrich rearers should be prepared to pay Sh80,000 to 100,000 for a 5-month-old ostrich.
If you can muster the patience to crawl at snail’s pace through the river of vehicles from Athi River without tearing out your hair, eventually the Maasai Ostrich Resort will be well worth a visit.