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Opinion: Did they say simping is bad for your relationship? 'Issa lie'

 A man begging a woman [iStockphoto]

There are professional terms that, when placed in a social context, generate significant controversy, especially in the realm of intersexual dynamics. For example, the word "concession" sounds quite professional when used in boardrooms where decision-makers deliberate on compromises to be adopted when designing policies.

Projects often involve a diverse range of stakeholders with various interests, and when these interests are unmet, it can lead to disinterest or even a complete withdrawal. Therefore, a balance must be struck that ensures everyone is content enough to stay on board and work towards the larger goal. At this level, terms like "concession" and "compromise" sound professional and carry a positive connotation.

However, when it comes to relationships, these same words take on different meanings. I'm sure you're all familiar with the term "simping." A simp is a person in a relationship who lacks the confidence to question anything because they feel unworthy of their partner. They may feel less intelligent, less successful, or lower in socioeconomic status compared to their partner, making them feel entitled to less in the relationship. In the context of relationships, simps are viewed as desperate individuals who live in constant fear of being dumped because they are perceived as less valuable.

If one partner comes from wealth while the other hails from a background of poverty, the latter is more likely to bend over backwards to maintain their position in this newfound world of opulence. This dynamic is not limited by gender. If you ever find yourself in this disadvantaged position, don’t listen to outside opinions—just simp.

You see, the term now carries a completely negative connotation, yet it simply means that one person has to compromise more to make the relationship work. Interestingly, no two people enter a relationship as equals, no matter how much they try to appear that way.

When a man is better looking than a woman, the woman will inevitably feel insecure and may consciously or unconsciously work twice as hard to secure her place in his life. Out of insecurity, she might call the man 12 times in 12 hours, ostensibly to check on him, but in reality, it is her fear of losing him to a more attractive woman that drives this behaviour.

On the other hand, a less attractive man involved with a very beautiful woman might go to extreme lengths, such as installing secret GPS trackers or CCTV cameras in her car to monitor her movements.

Anything this woman says becomes law to the man, who is at her beck and call. The man wouldn’t hesitate to cut off his family and retreat into isolation with her because she is out of his league, and he feels fortunate to be in her presence, let alone to share personal moments like using her shampoo.

But all relationships are built on such imbalances, and everyone should recognize that their role in the relationship is unique. When I see women urging other women to take charge of their relationships, I think about the uniqueness of each relationship and why such generic advice cannot apply to all situations.

Some of these hardcore feminists become chief simps when they meet a man who excites them deeply. They slip into traditional gender roles, assuming responsibilities in the kitchen without being asked, washing clothes—including the man’s underwear—without a word of complaint. They use terms like “my King” to refer to the man. This happens to everyone when they find someone who matches them perfectly. Life is a long, winding journey, and people should be cautious about adopting hardline stances on situations they do not fully understand.

Rumour has it that some of the most vocal champions of men's rights are, in fact, suffocating in their own marriages, where their wives command them like domestic servants. Yet these men maintain a macho facade in public, telling other men not to simp. Does Amerix have a wife? If so, we should interview her to gain insight into the domestic dynamics between them and whether he is as stoic and unyielding at home as he portrays in public. My point is that before we adopt any social posturing, we should understand that our thresholds for compromise are different in various relationships, and we should not feel pressured to impress people who do not know us and whom we do not know.

If ceding ground gives two people the balance they need to be happy in a relationship, they should protect that dynamic and "simp" accordingly and as often as needed. In fact, the truth is that in any relationship, people take turns simping, just like the pedals of a bicycle alternate to keep it moving. The two pedals continuously change positions, with one up and the other down, in an endless cycle that only ends when the journey is complete. This is the true meaning of “till death do us part,” as pronounced by priests on wedding days.

Like a bicycle ride, life is a journey of two individuals determined to reach the end of time together. We must embrace alternating energies at different times to make it to our final destination.

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