“Mum, I need you to be careful when going out to meet this stranger, and I need to know that he will not take advantage of your gentleness and empathy – he must pass the test before we can allow him in our lives,” seven-year-old Audrey Kimutai told her 32-year-old mother after listening to her phone conversation with her ‘new suitor’.
Lisa Wanjiro, a psychologist says parents think of children as being less knowledgeable than adults when the truth is that there are many things that they have experienced and lots of things that adults can learn from their children.
“Adults are not the only knowledgeable ones, and children know a lot of things that adults do not remember, partly because their perception of time is different from that of children – to a child, a day seems like an eternity, and children are much better at treating things diversely,” says Wanjiro.
The psychologist explains that there is great satisfaction in being drawn and learning from children, especially from their innocent perspective of things, and spelling it out as it is, sometimes spilling out the truth that we as adults are afraid of facing.
She further says that to a child, every day is a fresh start, unlike adults who tend to let the baggage from the day before follow them to the next day, instead of treating each day as a new day, thus giving them an opportunity for a fresh start.
The psychologist explains that even adults (parents) can transform their lives positively by picking some child traits. She gives the following as lessons to learn from children.
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Creativity
Children are always on the creative path, and as parents, we would do well if we spent some time creating something by observing the creative minds of our children, says the expert.
“My six-year-old son is always doing something new, may it be building his dream home, painting his ‘new Lexus’, since I will not allow him to touch mine to do a ‘trial’ with it,” says Lucy Mucheru.
She says that the creative mind of her son has given her great satisfaction through observation. She has since learnt that she can draw a lot from her son’s creative endeavours, an element she had lost touch with as she grew older.
“It is a proven fact that as they grow older, most adults and parents push creative pursuits to the bottom of their “do” lists,” says the psychologist.
Challenged by her son, Lucy now spends time creating something, whether doing some DIY tasks, such as reorganising her home, painting, or reading a novel, things she has picked from her son’s creative mind.
“When doing these projects, I completely immerse myself fully in the project the same way my son does,” says Lucy.
Courage
Wanjiro says children are more courageous than adults. She says children will go beyond challenges to put on a show of something they are confident about.
She says a child will stand on a stage in front of an audience to recite a poem, sing a song, or take an adult on a zipline because they are courageous enough to put up their act – something that an adult might shy away from.
“Unbridled courage comes more easily to children who have not experienced the down of life, whereas adults would greatly benefit from adopting even an ounce of that courage,” says the expert.
Charisma
Outside of tapping into the creative mind of her son, Lucy says she has learnt to tap into his playful and energetic nature.
To the amazement of her neighbour, she says, she plays hide and seek game with her son, builds mud castles and other games often seen as a children’s activity.
According to the psychologist, other lessons parents can learn from children are making friends, experimenting with new things, and playing hero in recognition of their efforts, a great stimulant to exploring new things.