Lessons from a bridal shower

By Julie

I had a bridal shower on the eve of my wedding. At this time, I was too tired to learn much; and too excited for anything to stick in my head.

But I learnt a few things that day — like I should not be on my pees on my wedding night or on honeymoon (too late, that one), that if I have no plans of a honeymoon baby, I should be on contraception (another one that was too late, unless I planned to look for a gynae while on honeymoon).

Even the most street savvy girls need a bridal shower. Not only do they offer one last giggle with the girls before a change of status, but it is also a time to receive fancy gifts, particularly for the bathroom and bedroom.

Time to learn

Trust me, when a woman has spent the last few days running after a planner, or florist or caterer, the last thing she will remember to buy are bath salts and slinky night gowns.

Again, every girl needs to be reminded on that day on the seriousness of the institution she is about to join.

 This is the chance for the married women to truly open their hearts and tell of the things they have struggled with, what they have learnt, what works and what doesn’t. Like being told that splitting duties 50/50 is a myth, and that the male ego can be huge!

The bride-to-be should also be reminded of certain essentials — like removing certain body hairs,?carrying lots of lube, and relaxing, especially if that is her first time. For first timers, there are also such realities of the few who discover they are allergic to their partners sperm, or those who find one week later, penetration is yet to occur due to pain or inexperience. If no one mentions such things to a naive bride, she might panic thinking she is not normal.

I guess the most important thing I learnt in my shower is to let my hubby know if I’m too tired on the wedding night, which I was, that we could shower and sleep. We had the rest of our lives together and could wait to enjoy the marital bed without aching calf muscles and drooping eyelids. And we did wait — until early the next morning.