In most societies of the world, long gone are the days when a man would walk around the village playing with a piece of stick in his hands, spot the kind of woman he would like to marry, lay in wait to elope her with the help of his friends and that very day make her the bearer of the first of his sixteen children to be.
Also gone are the days when the community and the family would make one marry from a certain family because that family’s great-grandfather was the best cattle raider of his age set. One could also not marry in another family because, there, children start to walk before they can learn to speak.
In our time we can look at these locally organized relationships and marriages as backward, inhuman and devoid of true love, however with all honesty we can concur that many of such marriages lasted forever. This is evidenced by our parents and grandparents who are now above 6o years and are happily married. It is also evidenced by the many modern marriages which are breaking apart as early as before the first anniversary.
With all conviction I can attest that the lovelessness in the relationships and marriages of our time are due to women trying something which they are not wired for, named, falling in love. Women do not fall in love they grow in love. This means that a man sees a woman and falls in love with her then she can either accept or reject that love.
A woman will accept a man’s love because she is attracted to him but that love should be consistent to make her own love grow. It is disastrous for a woman to get attracted to a man then start making indirect advances on him. When this man with time appears to start loving her, it will be the beginning of a loveless relationship. If a man does not fall in love with you at the first encounter, forget it.
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When a man marries a woman he loves, he will give her time and opportunities to grow to love him. He will excuse her mistakes, neutralize misunderstandings and fulfill her desires. If he happens to marry one who fell in love with him, eventually even her very footsteps will infuriate him.
When a woman is loved, she will respond with a good measure, pressed down, shaken together and overflowing. A man who claims to have loved a woman and she ended up betraying him, did not actually love her. He thought he did but all along he just loved himself and no sooner did she realize that she did the necessary.
Please my sisters, when a man loves you (you know you can easily tell) respond to that love. If he proposes for marriage do not let him finish the sentence before you say a loud YES unless he is a psycho or there is something really serious about him that you cannot live with.
Forget the vanity preferences of height and complexion. These are high school fantasies. For heavens’ sake, this is a person who is willing to accommodate your complex personality for the rest of his life where is a broad chest coming in!