When El Nino took Kenyans by storm

With rainstorms forecast to rival Biblical Noah-era proportions, Kenyan planners decided not to leave anything to chance. Not only was the National cereals and Produce Board promised a princely sum of Sh50 million for unspecified "Agency and Management fees", but there was Sh1.1 billion set aside to rebuild classrooms that were expected to be destroyed.

Sh35 million was meant to hire helicopters to transport KCPE and KCSE exam papers to areas that El Nino would cut off.

Non-carcinogenic bars of soap, food and non-food items were supposed to be shipped to 40 counties at a whopping Sh200 million. Many counties also decided to do some creative accounting in their El Nino disaster preparedness so as to ensure the entire Sh12.8 billion would be well spent.

But with the decibels from the teachers' strike, political confrontation over the National Youth Service millions and multi-billion-shilling Eurobond paid to construct unnamed projects and lenders, a watered down national Cabinet, feuding lawyers, an imminent implosion at the Judiciary, a war of words between the Senate and National Assembly, Frequent Traveller mileage claims, an airborne CEO et cetera, et cetera, et cetera ad nauseum...you now understand why nobody realised El Nino came and went and millions of shillings with it. We wish you all a rain-free 2016.