Nairobi women have lost their souls to West African brothers

Kenyan women always favour foreign men. Be it the Dutch village priest, or the British ‘Johnnies’ will always have a head start compared to Kamande, the local County Rep. A foreigner stands a better chance  any given Sunday.  

 White men are primarily preferred as passports out of the country, and yeah many women profess undying desire to sire a child with a white man. ‘They are so ‘cuuute!’ They often pipe, swooning.  

 What beats me is how the Nigerian ‘Oga’ men have overtaken our revered Omondis in matters of love and romance. For a while, our lakeside brothers made the rest of Kenyan men look like beginners in front of women.

 And as long as romance was measured in terms of flowers, cards, and flattering language, men, more so my clansmen had absolutely no snowball’s chance in hell with fair-skinned, curvaceous women. At some point I had a personal grudge when I twice lost beautiful ladies to Luo men!  

 Now Nigerian men are the most sought after in Nairobi. And they are everywhere. From the leafy suburbs to middle-class estates such as Lang’ata and South B, to the dusty Umoja. They have barber shops which I am persuaded are just facades for something powdery.

The best bad boys in town

 They are currently the best bad boys in town. I don’t think they are any more handsome (and I am straight) than Kenyan men. While their borderline arrogance evokes suicidal and xenophobic thoughts in us, some women find it sexy.

They have fat egos, talk loudly, and have a sense of entitlement that is as repulsive as it is unmanly. Real men are calm, moderate, and rarely loud. But you can hear Nigerians arguing from the 18th floor of Hilton from Uhuru Park.

 These execrable habits that all Kenyan men hate are the very things our sisters fancy. I will be forthright: It is the money. There are women who can stand all forms of abuses as long as the sex and the money are good. These breed’s mantra is ‘it is better to cry in a Range Rover than laugh on a boda boda.’ Utterly hair-brained. 

 We often hear of incidents of ‘Ogas’ kicking hookers from the third floor without paying them. They abuse their girlfriends, yet most choose to suffer in silence provided the rent for that SQ in South C is sorted.

 Most Nigerian men treat local women cheaply. Indeed, most can hawk their soul for an iPhone, some tasteful furniture, and a weekend of guaranteed rum and single-malt whiskeys that local men can ill-afford.

Men from West Africa are overbearing, and the laidback nature of most us has made them conceited they walk around as if we don’t even exist. 

I am sick and tired of these ‘brodas.’ And now that our women entertain them, I’m sure they might scatter their wild oats and in future we will have children born of arrogant fathers and mothers who sold out their Third World souls to West Africans.

 I am a Pan-Africanist and want the Nigerians to prosper here as I would like to prosper in Abuja.  But they should behave with some decorum, cut the noise, and be respectful to their hosts.

 As for the ladies, don’t be too cheap, cheapskate. There is more to life than Dom Perignon  and fancy Galaxies. As you grow older and your Nigerian man’s clandestine affairs are busted, you will need your soul back. Someone ought to rein on this exotic curiosity of Nairobian women.

snyanchwani@standardmedia.co.ke

@nyanchwani