How I was made the domestic Dog

As we launch the locomotive, I am inviting you all to launch the grand opening of the sack of potatoes I carried from home. Fellow Patriots, this January we need to stand together as brothers and sisters. You surely, honestly know that my destiny is tied to your destiny.

My little sister is asking for viatu za pams, the shoes that will make her tall enough to be feared. That, she is now in class Three Elgon and she wants to take the role of a class monitor. I am trying to convince Madam Chepkirui to ban the shoes and if she does not, I will write to Matiang’i. I will also advise him to ban boys in primary schools from wearing trousers.

Frankly speaking, January has overstayed. Imagine from the day we chewed the last ribs on 1st and today is only date 13. Something needs to be done. How I wish Matiang’i was the CS for Labour, I am sure he would authorize we get paid on 15th. It is fine, lack of planning on my side does not mean an emergency on others’ sides.

Truth be told,
I feel so delicate,
So broke and so fragile. Of late I walk eyes open not to step on the tomatoes at the Archive stage. Each coin must be put into good use

Today in the morning I woke up and miraculously found my hand on my phone. The miracle part was that the phone was prompting me to ”Enter PIN”. Checking clearly I realized I was on Mpesa Menu sending Ksh 431 to Susan. I backed fast and immediately called Safaricom to make sure I had not sent her any money in my sleep.

This is January, each coin matters a lot.

As I plan on how to survive this month, I well have not forgotten the events of January of 1994. Mr. Kafaiko entered our class holding a GHC Textbook. I woke up from the afternoon sleep when he started talking about the family. That the family is the basic unit of a nation.

I was happy to learn that we were to form a nuclear family right there in class. So when Shiru was appointed to be the mother, I laughed and clapped happily knowing that she was to pick me as the father and Maiko was to be our gate keeper, at the best.

I could have filed for a divorce if she picked Jothefu to be our boy.
“Maiko, just wait she has to pick me”, I said looking at Maiko.
“She can’t, you stole her roasted maize the other day”, Maiko fired as he looked at Shiru with happy eyes.

Instantaneously, Shiru looked and gazed all around the class. I was damn confident that she was looking for one person; me Mteule.

In a moment, her innocent eyes met my experienced eyes and I narrowed the iris while enlarging the cornea keeping the pupil small and crossed my fingers. Maiko was picking sawdust with his feet. Like you already know my primary village school was not cemented. My first time to step on cement in a classroom was in form one.

“I pick Jothefu as the father”, she shyly said.

Jothefu rose from his desk and waved at everyone. It was sensational. To some it was emotional. I swallowed the bullet and waited. All I wanted then was to be the boy of the family.

“Maiko will be…”, she said and Maiko was up in the air before she could even finish.

“Wait...no.... no….let me pick the dog first, for it will protect my son when am not at home”, she said.

“And for the dog I choose…..”, she said the name.

And we all heard it.

I am not saying I was the domestic dog for the nuclear family but Mr. Kafaiko made me bark the entire lesson.

©Mteule™