You do not have to win all arguments

You strike up a conversation with your brother on whether to sell the parcel of land left to the family by your late father in order to engage in a business.

A harmless argument ensues. You feel selling it would be a bad idea given that land is a precious commodity in Kenya as it always appreciates.

This is an asset you feel should not be disposed of so easily because it may come in handy in future when real need arises.

Your brother, however, feels differently.

He has just learned of a lucrative business opportunity and feels you will all regret it later if you let this golden opportunity slip away.

What began as a sober discussion quickly degenerates into a heated exchange.

It is such emotive arguments that often result in violence, sometimes death. All because both sides must win the argument.

Truth is, both of you have valid arguments.

But the bigger of you will definitely walk away from that argument and instead work around the situation to look for an amicable solution.

This bigger person must be the one who allows God to direct his actions so that he feels convicted to let go.

Winning an argument may boost your ego and win you admiration, but it will lose you your dignity. There are people who delight in arguments.

Arguing for argument’s sake.

Paul urged his congregation to stop arguing among themselves. He urged for real harmony to avoid splits in the church. He pleaded with them to be of one mind, united in thought and purpose.

The cliché never argue with a fool holds true because it becomes difficult to tell the difference between you two.

The mature thing to do when you realise your simple discussion is escalating into an argument is to change the topic, remain silent or walk away.

Another thing and the most important one is to make it your goal to love those who disagree with you or seem disagreeable to you.

Go for the love, not the win.

In fact, God tells us love will always win.

Let God determine the truth as the truth is not determined by your thoughts, feelings or the opinions of others.

Truth is what God says it is, and He is the sole authority for interpreting any situation. Look for God’s presence.

Satan wants us to believe we are alone in any conflict.

God wants us to follow the example of the young David, when he faced Goliath.

He believed God was in the fight and that the battle belonged to the Lord.

Look for the conflict’s true source. According to God’s word, we are really not fighting other people; our real enemy is Satan and his “unseen spiritual forces of wickedness.”

Whatever you do, allow God to move you away from senseless arguments.