By MUGAMBI NANDI
Twitter@MugambiNandi
The urge to wade into the murky affairs of county governance has become irresistible. We have therefore reluctantly joined the fray to render a free, unsolicited advisory opinion to Their Excellencies the Governors.
Of course we are aware that there are 47 of them, and that not all of them stand in need of this advice. Their Excellencies have gone to court to seek an advisory opinion on whether they are accountable to Senate (or to anyone at all, we might add) for financial (mis)management in their counties.
They also desire a considered and unbiased opinion on the tipping point for their past abuse of office and corrupt practices, and the ones that they are currently or might in future be engaged in.
They want the courts to tell them without a doubt just how far they may push the boundaries of gross misconduct, nepotism and violation of the Constitution without losing their high offices.
In other words, they want it clarified just how much they may misbehave and plunder without being impeached. They want the elasticity of the Constitution determined (and expanded) once and for all. They do not want any ambiguity in the matter. If it were not for their modesty and sense of proportion (in short, their sensibility) they would seek a declaration that they are imperial lords, equal to, if not slightly above the law.
Our advice is that Their Excellencies should get rid of the notion that they are the equivalent of Governors in the United States of America. They should cease the delusion that they are miniature presidents of sections of the Republic. The United States Constitution operates on the basis that the country is a federation of quasi-sovereign states. The States started off on their own before forming the federation.
State Governors are, broadly speaking, gentlemen. County Governors are, broadly speaking, men. They are distinguished, with very few exceptions, chiefly by how rotund they are. They are lost in illusions of grandeur. They suffer from prolonged bouts of megalomania. It would suit them to embrace the concept of servant leadership.
On the other side of the spectrum, there are Governors who are so modest that they are operating, nay, eating, quietly under the radar. You will never see or hear them in the media. They disappeared into obscurity as soon as the small matter of remuneration was settled. You would not pick them in a crowd. They could join in a demonstration against the governor in their own counties and no one would notice.
Their actions and inactions will soon come to light. If they are receiving confidential payments, it is just a matter of time before the Auditor General shines his bright light on them. To them we say: take the cue from Binyavanga and come out! Let your work be seen!
Their Excellencies need to look carefully at the manifestos that propelled them to power. We are sensitive to the fact that they may not have been involved in writing manifestos because they paid their campaign teams to “put something together”.
We are also sensitive to the fact that they may not have read their own manifestos because they were busy on the campaign trail, and after winning they were busy familiarising themselves with the trappings of their office.
As we make our exit, let us remind Their Excellencies a true story. A former Member of Parliament for Kamukunji went to officially open a public toilet in one of the slums in his constituency just before the 2007 election.
We shall never forget the face of the old lady who accosted him and asked why he thought the residents needed a toilet when they had not eaten for months. This short story has nothing to do with recreational parks and hearses, sorry, ambulances.
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The writer is a lawyer