Why did the chicken, sorry the Kenya MP, cross the road?

By FERDINAND MWONGELA

As Deputy President William Ruto’s trial got underway at The Hague, I could not help but notice how the legislators who followed him would always make sure they greeted him before he went in.

Odd how the ‘peoples’ representatives’ forgot that Arap Sang, a kamundu ka magatheti (a small journalist) as Mwai Kibaki would say, was also in the vicinity. Or maybe, as Sang himself would say, he was too short to be seen.

Puzzled looks

Fortunately, to each his own. Fellow scribes were always there to receive Sang.   But the big question: What business did MPs have in The Hague? I am in no way against the chaps enjoying some hard earned holiday in the cold, and supporting Mr Ruto in his trial, although only God knows what ‘support’ means.

But then maybe this question is right up there with the likes of why did the chicken cross the road?

As images of the legislators kneeling down in front of the ICC entrance to pray (I hope) filtered back, people could not help but notice how The Hague residents passing by looked at them with puzzled looks.

At the local watering hole, wags compared their absence to a well-deserved break — for the Kenyan people that is. One drunk mused that for the period some of the legislators were out of the country, no one even realised they were not around and wondered what would have happened if doctors or teachers took that period of time away from their jobs.  How uncharitable.

But above al, this was the question of what value their presence at The Hague had for Mr Ruto and why they felt they had to wait for him (Ruto) to greet him. Even when security officers tried to push them away, they would not budge, until Ruto had greeted them and went in. I guess they plan to remind him, “You don’t remember how I greeted you when things were tough for you?” each time they need a favour.

Wicked mind

It reminds one of the ‘technical appearance’ mentality of Kenyans where one makes an appearance at a function for a short time but makes sure they have been seen. A Kenyans will walk into a wedding, make sure they shake the hand of the bride and groom, and then disappear. Then years down the line they will sulk if you do not make it to some fundraiser.

And oh, maybe it is just my wicked mind going overly creative. But I want to hope waheshimiwa can raise a plate of honourable looking chicken at The Hague, and not those warus (potatoes) they were photographed munching, or Sarah Serem has squeezed them dry.