Only successful man wanted

By Shirley Genga

Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the best mate of them all? Of course a successful man. A successful man can be summarised as a man who has a plan and knows where he is going and, very importantly, has something to his name.

Last weekend, I found myself on girlfriend duty. One of my campus girlfriends found herself dumped by a man with whom she had shared her campus pocket money when he had nothing. She had shared literally everything her parents had given her in the name of love. Even after campus when she got employed and he was jobless, she got a house and asked him to move in with her and took care of all the bills.

Dumped

Fast-forward to today. Her good for nothing boyfriend, now successful, has dumped her for some woman! I was once the naive romantic girl who believed in the tooth fairy and Santa Clause. But you will not find that girl anymore in me. She died.

The old adage on picking a mate was rather romantic. A woman would find a man who did not necessarily have to be successful, but had potential. They would then get married and start off with nothing apart from his pocket radio. The said woman would then suffer from lack but she would endure until her husband was successful. And then they would go on to live happily ever after. Rubbish.

In today’s world, things play out very differently. A woman finds her diamond in the rough, cleans him up and encourages him until he becomes successful. Once her husband or boyfriend is successful, he proceeds to trade her in for a new woman who he believes fits better with his new level of success.

Thus the new and improved adage goes something like this: “Build a man to the point of success, and he will replace you immediately. Instead find a man when he is already successful.”

For some reason, success often brings out the worst in men, especially in the love department. Men seem to get some sort of success disease that causes selective amnesia and makes their ego grow to elephant proportions. As a result, the loyal ‘old’ is no longer enough and is thus quickly replaced with something ‘new’. The irony of the whole situation is that men will often leave the woman who loved them when they had nothing for a woman who would not have given them a second glance had they known them when they had nothing.

So, wizen up girls. Those days when the good girl — the long suffering woman who loved her man despite his lack of success — got all the glory and was rewarded handsomely are dead and buried.

This is a new brutal world and if you want to be a happy woman, always go for a man with good character who has experienced some level of success. Avoid Mr Potential at all cost. 

Be warned: If you find a Mr potential or Mr I am on my way to success, avoid dating him until he has attained success, or be prepared to be dumped and cry a few years later.