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1. Don't pursue her for her money or to make yourself look good by having her as a trophy. When she finds out you are using her, she will cut you off instantly. She is not afraid to protect herself.
2. Don't expect her to slow down her career growth. She can balance both career and family if you show her support.
3. Be the man who talks to her about her heart and emotions. Everyone is talking to her about money, profits and career. Be the one who sees her when others don't.
4. Be there for her. Most career women are super women to many but she too, needs someone to lean on.
5. Pamper her even when she can afford it. She is not looking at how much money you spend on her, but your kind gestures that make her feel special.
6. When she does spend money on you, appreciate her. Don't make her feel you take her kindness for granted just because she has success and wealth.
7. Don't fight her success, you two are not in competition. Celebrate her, when she succeeds, you succeed. A secure King doesn't fight his thriving Queen.
8. Be her oasis of peace, fun and pleasant escape. Let her run to you to feel like a woman who is cared for, her professional life can be stressful, cut throat and unforgiving.
9. Understand when she cannot give you time or when she has to travel, her profession can be demanding. When you treat her right, she will deliberately make time for you.
10. Don't fight her social life or be intimidated by her high flying friends. Trust her even as she networks. She is yours, she has chosen you.
11. Find out if the smile she wears is genuine. A lot of career women are wearing fake smiles as they break down inside. Go beyond her beautiful mask and Instagram beauty.
12. Don't silence her voice. She is opinionated and hasn't been educated and successful to be silenced by an insecure man. As she respects your point of view, respect hers too. Learn to dialogue, her difference of opinion is not an attack. If you don't find her approach loving, tell her "Honey, kindly use a more inviting tone" instead of intimidating her.
13. Don't expect her to shelve her dreams for you or for marriage. She has a strong identity; marriage is not meant to stop her but to bless her. She knows there is more to life than marriage. Encourage her in her pursuit of purpose.
14. Challenge her. Don't be lazy. She doesn't want a man to baby sit, she wants a man with his own vision and who roars like a King, a life partner she can be proud of.
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15. Don't be a male chauvinist or hold on to outdated thinking. She has been exposed and will not allow you to put her down in the name of culture that demeans women and elevates men. It is not that she is rebellious, but that she wants to be treated with the love and respect she treats her man.
16. Don't expect her to stay with you because of your money. If you mistreat her, she will pack and leave, she can take care of herself, what she needs from you is loyalty and companionship. You cannot keep her hostage.
16. Realize that underneath the makeup, presentable voice, high heels and fashion; she is actually a simple woman in need of love and is not that complicated.
17. If you notice flaws in her, don't judge her, understand her. She might be defensive because many have abandoned her after using her, be patient in your interaction with her. She might seem tough but inside she needs a man to love her and who she can love. Prove to her she can let her guard down, inspire her to be better.
18. Give her assurance. Many seek to use her, many gossip about her and hate on her success. Let her count on you to be by her side.
© Dayan Masinde
In my new book, MANHOOD SERIES, I walk with men towards understanding themselves and help women to understand men. I talk about how to be proactive and to cultivate a vision and take charge as a man; plus the man's place in marriage and family. I talk about how to deal with men's issues.
In my other new book, WOMANHOOD SERIES, I walk with women towards understanding themselves and help men to understand women. I talk about the woman and her purpose, leading her life, not being a victim of circumstances; plus the woman's place in marriage and family. I talk about how to be emotionally rational.
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To purchase the MANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word MAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.
To purchase the WOMANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word WOMAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.