Sweat, tears and triumph for women juggling college and motherhood

Egerton University Vice Chancellor Prof Rose Mwonya

Female vice chancellors from across Africa who attended a leadership and networking event in Nairobi last month talked about the sacrifices women who pursue education make while scaling academic heights.

They said societal pressure heaped on women to get married and raise children has for long stood in the way for women who wanted to study beyond their first degrees.

Egerton University Vice Chancellor Prof Rose Mwonya during the event revealed how she sacrificed the first years of her marriage for a PhD. She said during her time as a student, women who pursued education sacrificed marriage and motherhood.

“Schooling up to university meant a woman had to sacrifice family and her place in the society.

“I remember the emotional struggle I endured when I went to Iowa State University for my PhD. That was in 1987 and I had a very young family. I had to leave my children (aged one and two) with my husband. It was tough for him but unlike many men then, he was willing to support my career growth,” said Prof Mwonya.

She said this societal exclusion has in turn excluded women from taking top leadership positions, especially in universities, as they don’t have the required qualifications. In a 31 public universities in Kenya, for instance, only eight are headed by women.

A 2016 survey that was conducted by Commission for University Education on status of compliance with gender diversity in management of university education revealed that female staff occupied less than 20 per cent of administrative positions in universities.

At the University of Nairobi for instance, only 15 per cent of administrative positions were filled by women while a paltry 13 per cent of positions were filled by women at Moi University. At zero per cent positions allocated to women, Kisii University performed the poorest on gender diversity in administrative positions.

But society is changing as more married women go back to class to juggle motherhood and education. Hashtag spoke to female students who opened up about their motivation, challenges and how they were balancing motherhood and education.

My husband takes our baby to work

 

Lucy Nganga, 30, is a first-year community development student at St Paul’s University. She got married after she graduated with a diploma in graphic design from Nairobi School of Design. Later into her marriage, she realised her biggest desire was to work with the community, besides being a mother to her two-year-old daughter.

She says it has not been easy juggling motherhood and college life.

“All was well until the beginning of this semester when the babysitter left without warning. I had to spend the first three weeks of the semester at home taking care of my baby. Though I tried to read at home, the university requirements dictate a 75 per cent class attendance before one is allowed to sit exams. There were days I carried my child with me to class to ensure I met my quarter.”

“My husband was initially against the idea of leaving our child with a house girl, but he understood my desire to go back to class. He became very supportive and offered to take our child to his workplace when I had exams to sit and there was no one around to take care of her. I am determined to pull through motherhood and studies though the journey is not easy. I decided to take the half-day arrangement where I get to be with my child the whole afternoon. I also try as much as possible to limit the assignments I take at home so as to give my baby as much attention as I possibly can.”

I deferred studies after first semester

Felistus Mutune, 28, not only has to juggle college education and motherhood, but is also a full-time government employee. Catching a nap in a matatu after a tedious day at work is a luxury that the Moi University Linguistics, Media and Communication graduate who went back to school can’t afford as she has to peruse through her college notes the moment she settles on the matatu on her way home every day.

She talks of how it has been from the time she enrolled for a Certified Secretary Class at Path Institute in January.

“It isn’t easy to juggle studies and work especially if you are also a mother and a wife. In fact, it was so tough that I decided to take a break after I sat my first semester exams. I study on my own and only visit the library on Saturdays from 11 am after I have spent the morning hours with my son. Most times, I study on my phone on my way home from the office. When I get home, I perform my wifely duties and study a little more after I put my son to bed.

“I also have plans to enroll for my masters next year because this is the time I can afford to study before my son goes to school and the expenses increase.

“Even though my desire to study is at its peak now, I know that my marriage and my son come first. You can sacrifice education but you can’t sacrifice motherhood. You can re-sit a class examination but you can’t re-sit the test of motherhood once you fail. Now that my son is two, an age that is characteristic of adventure in growing children, I know that I must be there for him as much as I can to journey along with him in this important stage.”

My husband once brought our baby to my school

Faith Nafula found job searching an arduous task when she graduated with a degree in Music from Kenyatta University. Her new found interest in customer service was met with obstacles as potential employers told her she needed a qualification in public relations.

Going back to class was a challenge for Faith who got married almost immediately after her first degree and already had a child before she started looking for a job. But with support from her husband, and keen to do all it took to get a job, she enrolled for a post-graduate diploma in PR at Kenya Institute of Mass Communication. Nafula, then 26, was doing her third semester at KIM when she got pregnant with her second child. She pulled through studies with her pregnancy and gave birth on the same month that she was expected to sit her exams.  Her second child was two when she enrolled for a Masters degree in counselling at Daystar University. It is at this time that she says she felt the strain of juggling education and motherhood.

The 36-year old shared what she went through and how she eventually hacked both motherhood and education.

“My biggest challenge was keeping a house girl. Domestic workers have a way of taking advantage of busy mothers especially those who juggle work and school. I recall driving six times in a day to take my children to school, get them home and go to school. My schedule was also very tight as I slept at 3am after studying all night and completing my class assignments.

“Though my husband has been supportive of the idea that I get as much education as possible, even going ahead to pay for it, he struggled with the arrangement especially when he had to babysit the children when I went to school. I remember one day he brought them to me while I was in class.

“It wasn’t easy but I pulled through the challenges and even created time for my children. I avoided Saturday classes and the library just to spend as much time as possible with my children. I preferred to borrow books and do as much work at home as I could.”

I stay with my son but I never see him

Though Charity Wafula and her six-year-old son stay in the same house, they never get to see each other for as long as a week. Ms Wafula, 30, says she lives a busy life juggling between a demanding job and school and has to sometimes sacrifice motherhood.

“Being a nurse, I sometimes work night shifts that can at times stretch for seven days nonstop. I also enrolled for daytime counselling classes at Mount Kenya University, Mombasa campus. Between the two roles, my son and I can hardly afford time together.

 “I don’t get to the house until 9am when my son is usually in school by that time. I also leave for school during the day and go to work for my night shift before he comes home from school. I have missed him for the two years I have been in school.

“When I get a day or two away from my job and studies, I spend as much time as possible with him. On such occasions, I drive him to school and take him out for bonding sessions.”

I drove to Nairobi every weekend for my classes

Margaret Chemuku is perhaps one of the busiest students; juggling class, a full-time job, three chama meetings and sticking to a wellness programme. She has maintained a 14-kilometre jogging routine alongside her husband every Sunday morning. On top of this, Ms Chemuku manages a thriving poultry business with more than 100 chicken in Nakuru.

While she lived in Kakamega, Chemuku recalls travelling to Nairobi every Thursday night to attend her classes while she pursued a diploma in Applied Biology. She would board another bus back home on Saturday night to catch up with her busy schedule at her workplace. The 36-year-old is a student at Kenya Methodist University where she enrolled for an online postgraduate diploma in Microbiology. She says studying while raising her two-year old son is not easy.

“I like to study between 9 pm and 2am. Most times when I wake up, my son wakes up as well and demands that I breastfeed him. Sometimes he takes long to go back to sleep and I am forced to give up my studying.

“Being a full-time employee only leaves me with the option to study online. I can easily do this at home without having to attend any physical classes. All I have to do is work with deadlines that are given by our lecturers when they send us assignments through mails. I am also able to use any little time I get during the day to study using the free Internet connection at the workplace.”