Why men should control women's money

Every time there is a pyramid scheme, a land scam, or any con game in town, I always examine the number of women versus men caught up in the mess. Statistically, more women get conned than men in these scams.

The men caught in such scams are mostly the lazy or greedy ones. The women caught up in the drama are often vulnerable, even though greed has lately played a big role in the swindle games.

Increasingly, women are out-earning men. Such women are having difficulties finding suitable partners. Those lucky to be married will give their men a hell of a ride and such marriages are often doomed from the word go, unless the man gets a better job or excels in business. In families where men earn more than the women, there tend to be peace, happiness and sustainability. But when women earn more, there is no marriage.

The bone of contention is that whereas women are earning better, few know how to make proper financial and investment decisions. Most end up buying expensive cars that they can’t maintain or buy land in outposts just because some radio personality drummed and hyped the rocky piece of land. And there are those hyper-inflated apartments in some shoddy overrated neighbourhoods that once were the pearl of Nairobi. 

The only thing I know women scrutinise deeply when they are buying is mitumba clothes and shoes. Unfortunately they rarely wear them - they just crowd the wardrobe and the shoe-stand. But in bigger investment stuff, few women get it right. They follow fads, succumb to the misleading advice of bullish chama leaders and in the end, they burn lots of money. Which makes me sad, because ordinarily, these are bright women who can beat me at calculus and Game Theory. But they never get it right on how to use their money. Think of the impulsive spending, expensive makeup, unnecessarily expensive hairdos...

The reason is simple. It is easy to lie to women. It started from the Garden of Eden and has not stopped to date. And when we offer this Solomonic advice, they think we are being sexist. I know there are women who entrusted their men with money, only for the foolish sods to drink it all up, or invest in something as idiotic as quail farming. But I always argue that when choosing a life-long partner, women should pick men with their brains and not with their hearts or eyes. His bedroom game should not cloud your judgement. Chances are that if he is good in bed, he is either a cheater, poor or prone to bad judgment. It is in the constitution!

Women who make right choices when picking men never regret because men are rarely impulsive, ever so cautious on how they spend their every coin. In fact, a stingy man is a good sign that you can trust him with your cash. Men plan everything and often would consult their wives. This is unlike the wives who always pull surprises when they turn up home so stressed with a bombshell that they have been swindled of millions by a Sacco run by a bishop. The swindling is so silly, someone has to have distilled water for brains to buy into it. By the time the con is revealed, they would have irreparably damaged their marriages. 

Consulting your man helps, in the sense that you are reminding him that he is the boss. It’s been proven that it’s detrimental to society and our wellbeing when women challenge masculinity. Feminists can shout from the rooftops and foam at their mouths. But facts beg to differ. High rate of crime, alcoholism and drug abuse, whether in Central Kenya or in the United States, have been attributed to over-empowered women.

When women are empowered too much, they shun marriage, or sit on their husbands. A divorce ensues, then the women try to raise the children as single mothers. Children raised by single parents often have problems. Sons especially are often unhinged and daughters get the wrong-headed notion that children don’t need their fathers. And the vicious cycle goes on.

We can end this, if women obeyed their husbands and let the men take charge of everything, especially their new-found money that is misleading them. Money is a means to an end, not the beginning and the end.