Curse words and four letter words

By Milly G

Koome is a very attractive guy who is in the race to becoming the Presenter. Quite the eye candy, he’s got the face and the body for the job. His cornrows become him and he’s confident and opinionated — just the kind of guy I want on my TV presenting an entertainment programme. But he also has a very annoying quality which I guess he calls attitude — cursing. Koome is one of those guys who the editor has to keep censoring because in place of full stops and commas, he punctuates his every line with four letter words. That may be cool in the States but back here, it still rubs a lot of people the wrong way, especially when done in the media.

Not that our society has ever accepted the public use of curse words or strong language for that matter. There are words my grandmother spits out, say when she slips and falls, and she has refused to tell us what they mean. She says they are dirty words that children should not use. Euphemisms are used in all our mother tongues to cover the, pardon pun, naked truth. Think of it: In Kikuyu, we use words like ‘answering a call’ for going to the toilet, ‘seeing each other’ for having sex, ‘visiting’ for being born and ‘being called’ for dying. Today, as ever, we like to keep our language subtle.

Even before there was globalisation, curse words crossed the boarders and became part of the global lexicon. Just like the word Safari, The F word and the S word are the two words so universally used that if an Eskimo or a Maasai said them, it wouldn’t raise an eyebrow.

Not so here

If the movies are anything to go by, curse words have become such a part of the American lingo that a boss can use them on her subordinates and a father can tell them to his daughter when he doesn’t approve of her choice of partner. They curse when they are excited and when they are furious, when they win and when they lose.

Back here, we haven’t managed to smuggle them into our film or TV programmes, which is why Koome leaves a bad taste in our mouths. After all we have just managed to kiss on television, which tells you that our society remains conservative. But I have seen curse words in books; well, writers have a way of exposing what we are really trying to hide. Curse words are used by young people on each other, and even then, just in clubs and when they are alone. The elderly and the middle aged are yet to appreciate the use of the S word and the F word. I remember listening to a pastor who could not understand why his son uses a certain curse phrase. So he asked the boy to translate it into Swahili, and the result was ‘mavi mtu!’ "Now, how cool does that sound?" he asked the congregation which was already responding with "Eeew!!!" for disgust.

So here are some guidelines on how to use those words some of us collect from Crunk artistes and action movies. I realise that most people cannot point out the first time they cursed. It just kinda grows on you and before you know it, your mouth is as smelly as a Rentokil truck. First, context is everything. Around here, cursing will most likely earn you more contempt than respect. Curse words are less fashionable here, especially if you bandy them in formal places like the office.

Look around you

Second, check your audience. Even in the club or among your peers, not everybody will be comfortable with the use of flowery language. So you may need to expand your vocabulary depending on whom you are addressing. If your boss is not eccentric, never let her hear the F word come from your mouth, even at the company party. It is likely to reflect as an F grade in your appraisal sheet.

For men, unless your chick is the down-for-whatever-girl, do not use curse words on your dates. Leave that for your time with the boys. Using the F word all the time shows that you are macho, all right, but not in a good way; in a narcissistic, nihilistic way, and that does not spell responsible loving boyfriend.

Third, do not try too hard. By all means express your self, but don’t curse just for controversy’s sake. I have realised that people who have some insecurities often cover them with an abrasive mien polished with a spray of curse words. These guys can sneak four letter words into a greeting; and I don’t mean sasa. Cursing needs to be justifiable, not superfluous. And sorry, not everybody will be intimidated by your aptitude for cross-boarder assimilation when you curse like you are auditioning for a blue movie. Some people can tell right away that you do not like yourself that much, and you have never been abroad. I suspect that’s the case with Koome.