How parents promote tribalism

We are in the car with my dad and my sister. My sister is at the back seat. She had erred. Apparently my dad had accessed her phone. He had seen all the messages she had been exchanging with everybody including me telling her to switch off her phone so that dad could buy her another one. She had been asking for a phone for a long time and I was suggesting a measure he could bow to. He did but at a price. Dad had forced her to surrender her phone so that he can get her a new one. As you can already guess the phone was in perfect condition.

My sister had been exchanging love messages with some Luo guy. Dad had seen it and he wasn’t that pleased. He adjusted his seat and gave her a sharp gaze and said without mincing his words: "NEVER SHOULD A LUO MAN COME INTO MY HOUSE ASKING FOR YOU."

He meant it. I don’t know how my sister took it but I am certain someday he’ll show up with a Luo man. You know, when they get denied something that’s when they want it so much, just like Romeo and Juliet. Then he turned to me and said the same about Luo ladies. I was cool with it. I didn’t think so much about it.

But then I wondered why my dad was so against the people from the lake side. They are cool, proud and flashy. What more could one ask for when the men have been termed as the most romantic of them all?

I have Luo friends. We laugh at those jokes depicting our uniqueness sometimes bordering on the stereotypical, sometimes just plain jokes. They are normal just like others but with 10 carat ego. That’s to it. Our people do not know them as we know them. I am talking about those who’ve grown surrounded by Kalenjins their entire lives. And this is what they make of Luos every time someone mentions them.

There have been plenty of scary and gory stories of Kalenjin women being murdered by their husbands from other tribes. This has created a perception that all tribes are the same, not excluding the Luos. The recent case was a Kisii guy who burned his kids before setting himself ablaze. During the burial the rallying call was ‘Marry within.”

The perception in the minds of many, is that Luos love violence. In as much as they are termed as romantic, they are seen plenty of times on TV throwing stones especially during Gor Mahia matches. What prevents them from meting the same frustration on their wife when Gor Mahia loses?

Luos love to brag about what they own. They love a flashy lifestyle that the world can see. Sometimes it’s not how it seems. A father would love to marry his daughter off to a well to do man, not a mere braggart. Why would you have a Mercedes Benz and you can’t feed your wife and kids? It doesn’t just make sense.