What if Hillary Clinton was a man?

So, Hillary Clinton, the Democratic Party nominee, is due to face off with Donald Trump, her Republican counterpart this November in one of the most charged election cycles in America’s history.

To say that this journey hasn’t been easy is to completely understate the situation. Hilary never breaths easy now, does she? When the GOP is not doing it, it is the American media peddling GOP’s nihilism. From “frustrating” her husband’s lovers, to staying in the marriage after betrayal which translates to “letting down feminism”, to not baking cookies like all “proper wives do”, to changing her hair, to being a workaholic, to doing paid speeches on Wall Street like most American politicians (Obama, Bill); a fact that has never affected her voting record before, to using a private server for “certified emails”... name it! Republicans have used every weapon in their armoury, but Hillary still stands.

Now Hillary is no saint. She is human, like you and me. She however, has lived her life extraordinarily well. A life committed to public service. Public service in America is not an enrichment scheme like it is back here in Kenya. As a young lawyer, Hillary gave up a luxurious career in Washington, D.C. to follow her then boyfriend Bill Clinton, to Arkansas. As she says in Living History, her heart won over her head. Here, her career as a children rights lawyer officially kicked off. She worked pro bono. Afterwards, she married Bill, who then became a congressman, then the governor of Arkansas. That’s when she started making news. She immediately quit private law practice to accompany Bill to D.C. in 1992.

As the First Lady of the USA, she was a proactive policy wonk unlike most of her predecessors, save for Eleanor Roosevelt decades earlier. As a matter of fact, during the ‘92 campaign, Bill had a phrase, “buy one, get one free” referring to the duo of he and Hillary. The 1993 health scheme was Hillary’s brainchild, it’s unfortunate that it flopped in congress, but she delivered the Children’s Health Insurance Program (CHIP) that has since covered over 8 million children.

Of course one cannot live such a long and successful life without making one or two errors in judgement. Daring to do something great is risking failing or risking making a mistake.

As Senator, she did vote Iraq (George Bush II’s war) and for that she has since apologized. On Libya’s regime change, I think aspersions are cast on her unfairly. Ultimately, Libya was President Obama’s call as the commander-in-chief.

Hillary has been blamed for everything you could possibly ever think of, even for riding on her husband’s power to make a name for herself, despite the fact that she’s the most talented of the two Clintons. What’s next on their blame list? The disappearing polar ice? The delayed Second Coming? You know…just some ideas…

So what if Hillary Clinton was a man?

If Hillary was a man, she would have been the President of the USA in 1992.

If Hillary was a man she would spew racist rhetoric, islamophobia, sexist jetsam, xenophobic feuds and get away with it. Interestingly, she would be deemed authentic, candid and a revolutionary. She’d be praised for speaking her mind and for steering America on the path of “greatness again”.

If Hillary was a man, she would never be faulted for cheating on the wife and in the same breath, the wife would be blamed exclusively for it. Donald recently asked, “If Hillary couldn’t satisfy her husband, what makes her think she can satisfy the rest of America?” Well, there you have it!

If Hillary was a man, her Iraq vote would be a non-issue. It’s ironical and ridiculously twisted to hear republicans, the biggest warmongers of all time call Hillary hawkish for her single vote, yet Bush II, the republican commander-in-chief, and his entire republican party were the orchestrators and executors of that war. Even ironical is that John Kerry, a former presidential candidate, who too voted Iraq, has never been subjected to such scrutiny and vilification. It would actually be significant at this point to remind ourselves that Hillary has been blamed for the Crime bill that President Clinton signed to law in the ‘90s, notwithstanding that she was a non-voting First Lady as compared to Sanders, a senator, who voted YES to that bill.

If Hillary was a man, she wouldn’t be called “scary”, “a congenital liar”, “a witch”, “an unpopular” candidate with a high enthusiasm “gap” among voters for her feisty and no-nonsense attitude. She’d be deemed the leader.

If Hillary was a man, her expensive Armani jacket wouldn’t matter, just like The Donald’s $10,000 suits.

If Hillary was man, she would be completing her second presidential term this year.

If Hillary was a man, she would never be forced to answer questions like “why don’t women like you?” during presidential debates, just like men are never asked why their fellow men “don’t like them”. How can that even be a real question in a presidential debate when blatant misogynists and numskulls are debating on the GOP side on how to roll back women’s rights by defunding Planned Parenthood and punishing women for having abortions and perpetuating unpaid maternity leave?

All this while insinuating that one of the most qualified presidential candidates in America’s history; a Wellesley valedictorian, a Yale Law School graduate, a worldwide celebrated children and women rights advocate, a proactive First Lady, a two-term Senator from New York, a former Secretary of State, a progressive (to the far left of Obama) and the most admired woman in the world for the 20th time in a row is only getting ahead because she’s playing the “woman card”. Wow.

If Hillary was a man, Bernie Sanders would have suspended his campaign a long time ago, conceded already and endorsed the people’s choice. His “Philadelphia convention” feuds to try and bend the hands of the super delegates are just ridiculous. Immoral is how he continues to fundraise for a campaign that has clearly hit moot. Poor contributors (sic)! Worse still, he continues to divide the Democratic Party by unfoundedly claiming rigging, inciting his angry supporters and fuelling their Hillary-hate, some of who have shifted their allegiance to Trump already. 

But alas! Hillary is a woman. But she is not just any woman. She is super qualified, super prepared, far more than any of her predecessors. She wants to raise the federal wage to $12 per hour from the current $7, equalize worker’s pay so that a woman doesn’t make only $0.79 for every $1 a man makes, reform Wall Street, expand social security, tax the rich and cut back taxes on the working class, guarantee a paid leave of up to 12 weeks, reform the criminal justice system, invest in early childhood programs like Early Head Start and childcare provision for working parents, protect immigrant rights, defeat ISIS, make college affordable, defend Obama care plus cut costs on prescription drugs, invest in HIV research; Alzheimer’s, curb gun violence by tightening gun acquisition laws, build clean energy (solar, wind) to curb climate change, enforce universal human rights (disabled, LGBTs), end unaccountable money in politics, protect veterans’ rights. This is just but a summary of her plan and her track record proves she will deliver. She has fundraised for down-ticket Democratic seats to ensure a blue congress and senate, to help her pass her policies when she becomes president, a departure from what Obama had to deal with.

What about Donald? Does he have any real policies beyond building walls and prefixing people’s names with “ugly”, “crooked”, “lying’”?

Nevertheless, Hillary still has to shrink herself to suit certain interests. She can’t celebrate her victory for making history as the first woman nominee of a major US party; for finally shattering that glass ceiling and for being far likelier to shatter the next and become the 45th president of the USA; for validating the dreams of 3.5 billion women worldwide because Sanders and his Bernie Bros are too thin-skinned to handle it. It seems that the only way for a woman to succeed is to be far, far better than the competition and be neutral in self-promotion. She still has to wear her hair in a manner that’s not “too intimidating” or “too soft and feminine”. She has to be sorry for a few mistakes she’s made in her past, even when men have gotten away with such. She has to always, flawlessly smile for the cameras because that’s what women do. She has to take a man wagging his finger at her and telling her “shut up, I’m talking” in stride and grace. She has to always talk policy when her dictator-obsessed, temperamentally-unqualified, clown of an opponent spews all the venom about Mexicans being “rapists” and “drug dealers”; Muslims being “terrorists”; women being “pigs” and “dogs” and “disgusting animals” and as for Blacks? Well, just for possessing melanin.

And still the American media and pollsters equate this 2016 race to a case of two devils? Heh!