NAIROBI: While the focus of addiction treatment tends to focus on the addicts themselves, it is often the case that their spouse are also in need of help. This is because the coping strategies they have developed to deal with their situation is often maladaptive.
In some instances, an addict’s spouse will have developed mental and physical problems which can be directly linked to the toxic environment they find themselves in. Stress is another common occurrence and once this becomes chronic it can be harmful to their overall well being.
Further, the spouse may feel they are to blame for the situation and almost instinctively make excuses for their partner’s poor behaviour.
Some spouses will adapt to the abnormal situation by becoming co-dependent. They unconsciously become so impacted by their spouse’s behaviour that they make it part of their own sense of self. In such a scenario, the other person’s needs take over often at their own expense.
The co-dependent partner also becomes almost addicted to the chaos and by choosing to maintain the status quo, they become part of the problem.
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A co-dependent spouse will also suffer from low self esteem and be willing to follow the often tyrannical rule of the addict.
They may even deny that there is a problem and by doing so further enable the addict.
Addiction is a disease that can have a devastating impact on those closest to the sufferer. That is why the best drug rehabilitation programmes have family members get involved in their loved one’s treatment.
Through educational workshops, family therapy sessions and family visits, spouses learn new skills right along their loved one and practice those skills before their spouse returns home.
Such programmes will also often recommend resources in the local community as well, including therapy and alcoholic anonymous meetings.
